Prancing and Sucking

I quit my job, sold my home, and drove around the country in the summer and fall of 2006, training BJJ, finding myself, and landing in LA. I still travel a lot and get to train in amazing places. Some of my friends are irritated that I "prance" around the world and think I "suck" for doing so.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Congrats to my teammates!

New Breed acquitted itself very well at the American National BJJ tournament this past weekend. My teammate Paul won his purple belt division with a combination of some barn burners and some routs. Ugly (aka John), won the purple belt senior division very decisively. Chris Q won his blue belt division (and his brother Mike won his white belt division the same day in Vegas at Grapplers Quest). Mark, our teammate from Chicago, won his brown belt masters division.

We also had a large handful of second and third place finishes, as well as some people who competed for the first time. And win or lose, everyone did great just getting out there.

Huge congrats to everyone! Now it's time to gain back the weight you cut.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Possibly to be filed under "You had to be there."

First, today is my coach Eric's birthday. Happy birthday, Eric! And thanks for all the hard work you put into making me a better person. That job is not for the faint of heart; if anyone's up to it, you are!

Today is also my dear friend Chris' birthday. The Chris who is the source of so many amusing (to me) text exchanges. Happy birthday, Chris! And in honor of your birthday, here is another exchange between us, from a couple weeks ago. Note that none of what I say about my academy is true; it is rather the victim of a little poetic license. That would be obvious to me, but then again, I rarely say anything serious.

Me: How goes it otherwise?

Chris: DC is hot like an ox's ballsac

Chris: Work is for suckers but u know that...

Chris: Paperwork continues...

Chris: Just took a HUGE poop...

Me: You know a guy named Ox who is hot for Balzac? That's weird, but I guess anything goes in DC.

Me: You have to file paperwork for your bowel movements? Again, that sounds strange, but hey, whatevs.

Chris: U don't have to record your movements at yr affiliate?

Me: No, at my academy, we poop on a stick once a week and then for every gram of gluten they find, we have to do 10 muscle-ups.

Chris: Oh, when you posted today about reading people's minds? I spent half an hour failing to find an image or video of Homer when Burns wonders what he is thinking and it's a dead donkey with flies.

Me: Nice! There's also the time when he sings the Meow Mix song.

Chris: I actually had wine and bread last week on vacation. And it didn't kill me, and I got a pr on my clean and jerk yesterday.

Me: Scones are my power food.

Me: I'm happy for you!

Chris: About the big poop?

Me: That too! I assume all your documents are in order?

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Emily in the news!

My friend and fellow camp instructor Emily Kwok is being featured in BJJ Legends magazine. Check out the story:

http://bjjlegends.com/bjj/bjj-news/jiujitsu-mma-news/item/417-emily-kwok-world-champion-jiujitsu-black-belt.html.

Congrats, Em!

Picking it up

Another fun and educational time at the weightlifting meet. Here's how it works:

Each participant weighs in and then competes against others in his/her weight and gender class. Participants have three chances to establish a one rep max, which may or may not be a personal record, in first the snatch and then the clean and jerk. So this may mean starting with a weight you know you can do and then moving up to a weight that's more challenging, and finally one that might be beyond your ability, though I've also seen people go straight for a PR, miss it, and then nail it the second or third time. Women go first. Participants and/or their coaches submit the loads they want placed on the bar for their lifts, and there are two loaders who add the plates, which are in kilograms (and are color coordinated, so the lime green plates are 10 kg, for instance).

The bar sits either on a raised platform or, as was the case on Sunday at TCFA, in a taped-off square in front of the the three judges, who sat on plyometric boxes in a kind of semicircle, and the announcer, who sat behind a table with all the paperwork. Coaches give the announcer the loads for each participant, and the announcer tells the loaders what they are. He announces the person who is "up," the person who is "on deck," and the person who is "in the hole," which just means the person whose turn it is, the person who is next, and the person who is up after that. The judges decide whether the lift is good or not by giving it a thumbs up or a thumbs down--although James, one of the TCFA students, inadvertently gave a thumbs sideways once. I think he needs to work on his wrist flexibility. (Just kidding, James!).
When you complete your lift, you must hold it in the locked out position (either at the top of the snatch or the top of the jerk) until the head judge says and signals "Down." Then you can drop the bar in a controlled fashion, unlike what I did after my first snatch, where I literally let go of the bar at the top of the lift and kind of watched it bounce all over the place. Not so good. I did better subsequently.
The weight on the bar always goes up. What this means is that the weaker people go first and then the stronger people. And I may do my three snatches before a bigger or stronger (because the stronger people are not necessarily bigger) even does her opening lift. (Yes, this has happened, and did happen on Sunday. A couple of us finished all three of our snatches before one girl who was super strong even did her first one.) If I end up "following myself" in a lift, where I lift and then lift again because my weights are lower than the next person's, I get a couple minutes to rest.
There are also strategic gambits you can use to maximize your rest. For instance, you can submit a load that you know you want to change. Then when the announcer announces your load, you ask to change it, and then the rest clock restarts. Sneaky, eh?
When it's your turn, you have two minutes to start the lift. You can go before that, but you must have initiated the lift before the two minutes is up. I don't really know exactly what happens if you don't, because nobody went overtime, but I suspect you don't want it to happen, whatever it is. Different people have different rituals for before a lift, ranging from chalking their hands, to slapping their own faces and legs, to just kind of going up to the bar, setting up as well as possible, and going for broke (that last would be my ritual).
You can power clean and power snatch. This means that you do not have to receive the bar in the full squat position. You can bend your legs only as much as you need to in order to make the lift. This is what I like to do because I'm so squat challenged. Of course, people who are far, far better at lifting than I are more likely to drop into a full squat, because if your technique is where it needs to be, you can lift more if you drop than if you power. I am not there yet. Maybe someday.
Maybe.

For those of us who are mathematically challenged, having the weights in kilograms is a mixed bag; since I don't know how much is on the bar for me (Eric, Vanessa, and Michael make those calls), I don't know whether to be nervous. A well-adjusted person would decide not to be nervous at all. I decide to be nervous all the time.

Fortunately for me, the stakes here are pretty low. If I'm not mistaken, some people use these meets as entrees to bigger meets; their scores qualify them for bigger events. In my case, I just use it as an opportunity to practice the lifts and do so in front of an audience. I got two thumbs-up snatches and two thumbs-up clean and jerks, and then I got one thumbs down snatch and one thumbs down clean and jerk (the last one of each). This is because I "pressed out" on the snatch and then on the jerk. This means that instead of receiving the bar in the snatch and the jerk with my arms locked out, they were slightly bent and I had to straighten them after the fact.

This is a no-no. And it means that I do need to get lower as the load gets heavier. The feedback I get consistently from my coaches and teammates is that I have the strength to lift heavier, so I just need to trust that and get under the friggin' bar. Easier said than done. Eric said that people spend decades perfecting just these movements. I believe it.

Other no-nos are walking outside of the tape or off the platform (obviously, you don't want to walk off the platform), and of course, dumping, which entails dropping the bar and launching yourself in the opposite direction to minimize the likelihood of getting hit with it.

We saw some pretty sweet lifts. I'm going to think about how it feels to lift a PR successfully and try to describe it here; there were a couple people who fought like hell for what ended up being beautiful lifts, some after fighting like hell for what ended up being heartbreaking dumps. If you haven't at least tried to lift, and in front of an audience, no less, it might be difficult to imagine how difficult it is to pick up a bar that's heavier than any other bar you have ever picked up before. And how exhilarating.

Meantime, congrats to Vanessa, who PRed by a lot on her clean and jerk (can't remember the amount--I think it was about 145lbs) and to everyone who participated. Technically I came in first in my weight class, but that wasn't really what it was all about for me. I have tons of work to do and now I know how to proceed. Hooray! Thanks to Eric, Vanessa, Michael, and Kellie, as well as my teammates and cheerleaders. It's fun for me to get to know a different subculture, after spending so much time in the grapply one.

Friday, September 17, 2010

A different kind of competition

On Sunday I'll be participating in my second USA Weightlifting competition. Here are the details: http://teamcrossfitacademy.com/?page_id=3057

I have three opportunities to clean and jerk and then to snatch as much weight as I can. My score is the combined totals of all of these lifts. I am competing against everyone else in my weight class, which last time was me. So maybe it's not so different from grappling competitions.

But it is a pretty low-stakes situation for me, and it's a good opportunity to practice the lifts while dealing with nerves. It's gonna be fun!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

My promotion to black belt

Someone took video of my belt promotion. I tried to say something articulate. I failed. I also apparently don't know how to breakfall. Well, there's always something more to work on.

The lineup from left to right is John Ouano, Rodrigo Ranieri de Faria, Johnny Ramirez, Cristian Lopez, and Tatiana Araujo. Quite an impressive group!

Here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2eB-SJaF6w

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Momentum BJJ

My friend Cristian opened his own grappling academy a couple weeks ago, Momentum BJJ. It's in Buena Park, CA, which is about 20 min from where I live. You may recall that Cristian is my favorite training partner and that he, along with Johnny, are pretty much responsible for getting my skill level to the point where I might be worthy of a black belt. He moves like an eel, he is an incredibly thoughtful and dedicated teacher, and he is a fearless competitor. I'm proud to be able to call him my friend, and his support of my grappling and of me as a person has been invaluable.

If you are ever in Buena Park, visit him at Momentum BJJ! (http://momentumbjj.com/).

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Black magic

I haven't written too much about life with the new belt. I still jump a little bit when I pull it out of my gym bag and it's black instead of brown, but it's becoming more and more "normal." I like to joke that it is bulletproof (though I haven't tested this hypothesis) and that while I'm sleeping it travels through time and has adventures. Nobody can discount either of these conjectures; at least, nobody has so far. Although more than one person has offered to shoot it--while I'm wearing it. Such a helpful crowd!

What is persisting is the feeling I think I described the other day of being subdued. While I go through the motions of suiting up and tie on the belt the way I always have, no matter the color of said belt, sometimes I feel, well, subdued. I have been training regularly and making a point of helping people where I see that they need technique advice. And I feel confident that I can help them.

But then sometimes I contemplate the holes in my game, the poor performances I logged the last time I competed, the weaknesses in my teaching and coaching, the times when lower belts give me more trouble than I think they should, and I get weary. I feel like there's so much more to learn, and while on the one hand I'm excited because I can learn for me and don't have to prove anything anymore, on the other hand, I have everything to prove because of the color of my belt--and, added to that--because of my gender.

I know a lot of this is in my head, but from what I hear from my black belt friends, it's kind of natural. I've heard that it can take as long as a couple years to grow into the belt. And usually accompanying the growing pains is a tendency to get trounced like never before in competition. In my case things might be a bit different, because I regularly competed against black belts even as a brown , but in some ways it could be worse because now the pressure will be on me. If I lost to a black belt as a brown belt, well, that's what was supposed to happen. But if I lose to a brown belt as a black belt, it will throw me into a tailspin. And it will give people reason to question me.

I've been talking a lot with my friend Cristian, whom I credit along with Johnny for getting me to the point where I could even begin to be worthy of black. He got his almost 2 years ago and has been incredibly supportive of my path to the promotion and, since I got promoted, of the things I've been experiencing. He and I have a deal: We are going to keep each other honest in that we are going to train now because we love it and not because we feel compelled by any external pressures or expectations. We want to continue to do well in competition and live up to the belt, but for our own reasons.

Easier said than done, of course. Also easier to say that a world title doesn't matter when you don't get eliminated in the first round, like I did for both my weight class and the open at the Mundials in June. It's kind of like saying that looks don't matter when you resemble a lawn gnome. Only the Jessica Albas of the world get to say that, and when they do, you want to tell them to shut their anorexia holes, that they don't know what they're talking about because they've been treated differently (read: better) all their lives due to their looks.

I'm sorry, what was the question?

Yep, I know world titles, and titles in general are important. I'd be lying if I said they wouldn't be nice to have. But if that becomes my only motivation, then it gets depressing and overly stressful. And then, according to Robb Wolf, the stress causes my cortisol production to rise, and then I get belly fat. And then I have to buy one of those remedies that they advertise on daytime TV and in the middle of the night. As my 6-year-old niece would say, "I said no THANK you!"

Meh. It's like I said. I'm subdued. This morning I CrossFitted and realized I've lost a ton of strength; in August I didn't train much because of injury (my elbow and my groin) and travel. I'm more winded and more muscle fatiguey when I roll. So I guess I'm just riding a trough in my training. I tell myself I'll come out of it, but sometimes when I contemplate my age, I wonder if I will. Maybe this is the time when I really start to feel the years; maybe Dara Torres and Randy Couture are genetic freaks instead of role models. Well, all I can do is what I love to do. And given how the time flies and how I focus like a laser when I'm CrossFitting (lifting, specifically) and grappling, my guiding principles still seem to hold fast. So maybe in time I'll pull out of it.

Okay, bookmark this page for a year or two from now and we'll see how I feel. Right now, I'm just glad Brazilian jiu jitsu is all about lying on the ground.

Monday, September 06, 2010

Overdone

Even after all these years, I still apparently haven't nailed down how to train and rest effectively. I feel like I've been in a slump training-wise since after the Mundial in June. Once I got my black belt, I thought things would pick up, but August was basically a wash for me because of injury (elbow, groin) and travel (Canada, twice). I didn't CrossFit much at all, and I did train, but I didn't train particularly intensely. When I got back from grapplecamp last week, I overdid it and was achy for most of the week.

And I'm sleeping a ton. For me, this usually indicates that I am depressed, but I'm trying to think about it differently in light of the Robb Wolf seminar I attended right when I got back. Robb is a biochemist who, along with Loren Cordain, is the main proponent of the Paleo Diet. He came to Team CrossFit Academy last Saturday and filled my brain with all kinds of crazy useful stuff. But even in light of everything he knows about the effects of diet on health, well-being, athletic performance, mood, genetic conditions, etc, he said that the main takeaway from his talk was that sleep is of utmost importance. 8-9 consecutive hours per night. So I'm trying to take that advice to heart.

Problem is, the more I sleep, the more I want to sleep. I wonder if my body is trying to make up for years of deficit.

Or maybe I'm just getting old. I did turn 40. Usually I don't feel the effects of age--or should I say, I feel better than I ever have in my life--but lately I feel like the sleep is a double-edged sword.

The point is, for the time being, I've lost my competitive edge. I always waffle on the topic of competition anyway, and right now I'm on the soft side of the waffle rather than the crispy one. My black belt instructors say that it can take a couple years to get used to the new color, and I'm guessing that's part of what's happening here too.

The upshot is that I'm feeling more tired and less intense in my training lately. I don't know what's causing it, and I'm trying not to judge it. I suppose I'll just observe it and see where it leads. Right now, I'm gonna take a nap. Happy Labor Day!

Saturday, September 04, 2010

Low-hanging fruit

So I want to get back to writing regularly. I frequently have inspirations about things I want to write about, but it's usually when I'm in the car or the shower, or other places where I don't have a notebook or computer handy. This means that many of my ideas, some of which could probably be worthy of a Booker Prize--if I were the one deciding who gets the Booker and there were no other nominees that decade--get lost forever, either down the drain or out the tailpipe.

And then when I go to write, I blank. I want to write about the camp, about some things that are coming down the pike, and about my own continued journey to come to terms with the black belt, but I'm not inspired. I know that for me it's cyclical, and I feel like I'm moving toward the part of the cycle where I could actually be more productive and write a bunch. And some things are shifting around so that I should probably have more time to work on my book proposal, among other things, so I want to get back into writing regularly so I set the habit again.

Thus, I've decided to get the creative juices going by enlisting the help of my friends. I do my best to surround myself with hilarious people, and I do a damn good job. Well, at least, I think so. Maybe some of the laughs I share with my friends are of a "you had to be there" nature, but, true to the original purpose of this blog, I am going to amuse myself with some of my favorite text exchanges with some of my favorite people.

First, here is a brief exchange between me and my friend Natasha, who is actually coming to visit next weekend! She is a purple belt under Carlson Gracie, Jr., and when I met her 8 years ago at the gym in Chicago where we trained and where she still trains and is still a personal trainer, I hounded her until she started jiu jitsu. She probably started just to get me off her back, but since then, she has collected numerous belts, gold medals, and opponents' arms in her competition career, including a first place finish a couple weeks ago at the first IBJJF competition in Chicago.

This exchange is from the evening of UFC 118, which featured Couture vs. Toney. Natasha was out to dinner so I was keeping her apprised of results. Keep in mind that both Natasha and I are ladies:

Me: Couture arm triangled Toney.

Natasha: Good. Toney sounds like he's choking on his own nuts when he talks.

Me: He's sponsored by K-Mart.

Natasha: R u serious??

Me: I would never like about nuts-eating douchebags. Or K-Mart.

For those of you who don't know, Toney is a former boxer, a fairly successful one, from what I gather, who goaded Dana White into giving him a shot at a UFC fight. I know that many fighters, especially heavyweights, do not necessarily look ripped when they are in fighting trim, but Toney just looked out of shape. Unprepared. Over my years as a grappler, I have developed more and more respect for mixed martial artists. They work their asses off. And it just seemed that Toney underestimated how hard it is to be good at what those guys do. Couture took him down and choked him out in maybe a minute or two, without him throwing a single punch.

Anyway, moving on to my dear friend Chris. I've written about Chris too; he and I have known each other since about the 10th minute of college, so it's going on 22 years now. He is the brother I never wanted, and I am the sister he never visits, and through my blog, apparently I got him hooked on CrossFit, which he trains regularly in Washington, DC, where he lives with his family. I may even have shared my favorite exchange between him and me about CrossFit, where I proposed a workout called Fran Gone Bad, where after every round of a heinous three-round workout called Fight Gone Bad, people would do Fran, another heinous workout. I said something like, "Descriptions of Fran Gone Bad indicate that you'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll cry some more, you'll throw up, you'll sweat, and you'll void your bladder AND bowels. In short, you'll be left with no bodily fluids whatsoever, because they'll all be on the floor beside you."

And Chris wrote, "Interestingly, that's also the typical description of Shrimp Gone Bad."

Anyway, here is a snippet of a text discussion I had with Chris recently:

Chris: Is the six flags mascot supposed to be an undead pedophile?

Me: The 6 flags mascot has a mini undead pedophile now too. That one can get into cramped spaces.

Chris: How did someone think that was good?

Me: When conceptualizing the commercial, they got some subject matter experts from the catholic church and the america's most wanted list?

Chris: Exactly.

Me: And the music was composed/stolen from a heavy metal/polka band by Milli. Or was it Vanilli?

More to come, from my friends and from my brain. Frightening but true.