"I don't care what you think"

I've been thinking about this phrase a lot lately. About how often people say it, and about how rarely they actually mean it. Cartman says it. ("I do what I want!") Trashy people on trashy reality shows say it, usually while waggling their fingers in other people's faces, feeling the effects of a huge bender, repeatedly dropping the f-bomb, or some combination thereof.

But I also personally know lots of people who say it, including me. In my case, though, what that really means is, "I care what you think, but I'm going to do what I want to anyway. It's going to be hard, and I'm going to second, third, and fourth guess myself, and I may even lose some sleep. Goddammit, maybe I should just do what everyone else thinks I should do."

That's what that means. I have no insights about how to make it NOT mean that. I guess I'm just going to continue to do what I want, as long as it doesn't hurt other people. And try to catch up on my sleep on the weekend.

And yes, I guess this means I'm thinking about life, as usual, and what I want to do with mine. Also as usual, no answers. Just questions that make my brain hurt.