Pics from Abu Dhabi weekend

Here are the pics.

Me, Rachel, and my shiner in cute Princeton coffee shop:

Me and Tim/Stimy at Dojo:

Alicia, me, and Felicia eating pasta salad after the weigh-in:

Me, Alicia, Felicia, Johnny, and Jeannette showing off our ADCC stamps. You can't really see them, and I had to get about 3 because they kept washing off. But they were cool!

Jen and me after my fight. My hair looks frizzy because Anahi and Felicia braided it for me and when I was done competing I took it down. I don't have pics of my fight because, well, I was fighting, but I'm sure Alicia has some. So you will be able to see the Fight Hair in those. I'll post them when I buy some.

The hilarious Anahi and me.

Felicia, Anahi, and Alicia after Felicia's win. You can't see it, but it's a safe bet the belt she won is around Felicia's waist!

Crazy post-competition party at Outback Steakhouse with Andrew, Dave, Felicia, Alicia, Rudy, Johnny, Jeannette, me. Things that made it crazy: 1) Dave had coffee (to keep him awake on the 4-hour drive home; Dave NEVER has coffee), 2) Felicia had two bites of cheesecake, 3) we got extra sauce for the Bloomin' Onion, 4) we all went to sleep shortly thereafter.

So, technically I lost.

Okay, so I lost in the first round, but I’m really really happy with how things went. First, I felt like I played my game and lost at least partly because I wasn’t finessing the rules correctly. They were slightly unusual and I didn’t take advantage of them, specifically the no points/points configuration. In the 8-minute preliminary matches, no points were awarded for the first 4 minutes. This means that f I executed a sweep or took the opponent’s back in the first 4 minutes, I wouldn’t get the 2 or 3 points I would normally get. The judges worked it this way because they were trying to encourage fighters to go for submissions rather than playing the points game, which can be more timid and, frankly, boring to watch.

In my match, my opponent, a very game Ricardo Almeida purple belt named Emily Kwok, had come close to passing my half guard during the first 4 minutes. I didn’t let her pass, and then she took the pass in the second 4 minutes. So if I had let her pass earlier, she would not have gotten any points and then would have had to engage more, which would have given me some openings. But since she passed in the second 4 minutes, she got 3 points for the pass. This entire situation flashed through my mind in the 3 seconds before the ref yelled “POINTS!” And then I said, “SHIT.”

But the rest of the match, both before and after that, I felt like I pushed the action. I was mostly on the defensive, but had an answer for everything she tried: she tried to take my back several times but was never close, and she tried to rear naked choke me several times but was never close. I was able to recompose the open guard from the turtle position, which is something I have had difficulty with in the past, and, importantly, I didn’t feel outclassed.

I’m happy to say that both Johnny and Felicia said they were proud of me and that I fought a good fight. And the sole reason I had an answer for everything and didn’t feel outclassed is because I have spent the past two months training with them. They have been so incredibly generous with their time and expertise, and anything I did well out there is completely due to their instruction and encouragement. So now I get to thank them publicly: Johnny and Felicia, thank you so much.

Thank you also to everyone who called, emailed, and texted their support: Joemoplata, Wen, Jimmy, Moike, Woody, Parker, Kuan, Fat Tony, Todd, Noah, Tim and Danielle, Jen*, Natasha, and, of course, Mom, Dad, & Marjorie. And thanks to Jen for coming to watch! And for saying I looked really good even though she didn’t actually know what was going on!

Best of all, some time during that match, I completely lost my fear of competing. I don’t know how it happened, but it was like the fear just drained away. I had tried to pinpoint what made me so afraid—performance anxiety, all the people watching me, judgment, etc—but was never able to. But now it kind of doesn’t matter. I let my fear keep me from competing for about 4 years, but after the 3 competitions I have done since I’ve been in LA, I’m over it. I will probably always be nervous before a competition, but it won’t be the debilitating fear I have felt up until now.

So now I’m planning to compete in a tournament run by On the Mat, which I have mentioned before, on November 18-19, and then either a Las Vegas Grapplers Quest or a competition in Virginia that my friends Chrissy and Andrew will be running with another guy named Mike Moses, who runs his own academy in Maryland and who has offered me crash space there. Mike also said I could referee some of the matches at their tourney. (Have I mentioned lately how cool BJJ people are??) So it will be tough to decide which one to attend; either way, I’ll probably be flying from Chicago to get there. I’m thinking I’ll go where I’m likely to get the most matches.

Oh yeah. You’re probably wondering about the rest of the tournament. Well, it was fantastic. Felicia put on a BJJ clinic, winning her division by submitting two opponents (heel hook and rear naked choke) and dominating the third on points. This means 1) she will represent the US in her weight class (flyweight) at the actual Abu Dhabi tournament in May 2007 and 2) she now has a huge pro-wrestling looking belt that she couldn’t seem to take off for hours after she won it. Congratulations, Felicia! You worked your ass off and have beautiful jiu jitsu, and I’m honored to have been part of your preparation.

Johnny and Darren’s division went to Sim Go, a young brown belt under Marc Laimon in Las Vegas. My division went to Kelly Paul, a brown belt under Ralph Gracie in San Francisco. Philadelphia black belt Rick Macauley, whose purple belt girlfriend Anahi is a friend of mine (I really like Rick too, but don’t want to be presumptuous), lost a tough final to Chris Moriarty, an Atlanta-based black belt. Eliot Marshal, who recently got his black belt from Amal Easton in Boulder (and with whom I got to spar when I was out there in the summer—yes, he kicked my ass, but he did it with such finesse and skill that I thoroughly enjoyed myself and asked for more), lost a tough final as well, to a super strong Russian known only to most of us as Misha. I can’t really remember the rest of the divisions, but you can check out http://www.adcctrials.com/ for details.

After having dinner with Tim on Thurs night and seeing Jennifer off to work at about 1am, I drove from Brooklyn into Wayne, NJ, to meet up with Felicia and Alicia, or, as I like to call them (and they don’t really like being called), The Eeshas. We were able to get into the room early, so we lay around taking naps and shooting the breeze. There’s always kind of a collegiate atmosphere about competitions, especially when you are staying in a hotel, because you run into people you haven’t seen for a while and hang out in their rooms. So Dave, aka The Rock, aka DAB showed up, as did Johnny and Jeannette (a brown belt who trains with Felicia and Jimmy at Jean Jacques Machado’s). Rudy breezed in later, and then we picked up a stray who came with us on our trek to Whole Foods for some reasonably healthy dinner.

Weigh-ins were from 3-6. Most of the people I was with were fine, but there were one or two people who had to work to make their cutoff. We’re talking those crazy foil-looking sweatpants and hours on the treadmill. Everyone eventually made it, but some just barely. During the rules meeting at 6, Rob Kahn, a Royce Gracie black belt who has an academy in Tampa (I trained there recently when I was visiting my parents, but he was out of town, so I just hung out with his students) kept coming in from the treadmill completely drenched with sweat. He’d dry off and then get weighed behind a towel (he had to strip completely down). There was no peeking, as near as I could tell, and he finally made it. Good show, Rob!

Yesterday morning the Eeshas and I got ready to go and headed over to the venue at William Paterson University around 11:30. There was a mat and places to stretch out, so after we got situated, I sparred some with Crystina, Felicia, and Rudy to warm up and get loose. It was then that I started to lose my fear and get excited. So that’s cool. Crystina introduced me to Dean Lister, her instructor and a well-known jiu jitsu player and mixed martial artist. (I want to get to his academy in San Diego before I leave LA). I saw/met other grappling dignitaries in addition to him and the others I’ve name[droppe]d, and while I didn’t get pictures with any of them (didn’t seem like the time), here’s a list for my future reference: DC Maxwell, female black belt in Philly; Eliot; Rob; Rick; Tim and Sarah Shears (from Gracie Barra in Vancouver—also saw them recently in LA); Mike Moses;

There was some amazing grappling yesterday. It is both inspiring and daunting to see what some of these people can do. I was honored to be a part of it, even though I spent most of the time being nervous. I’m happy to say I won’t be doing that again. Well, I’ll be nervous, but not debilitatingly so.

So after I lost, I was free to watch the talent. It’s really hard to describe why I like grappling and jiu jitsu so much. But when you see a well-executed throw—like when one of the heavyweight women tossed her opponent like a sack of potatoes—or you watch someone gutting out a submission defense that you know they’d just rather tap to, or you almost feel someone coiling up and exploding one last time to reverse the opponent in the final seconds, you just know you’ve witnessed something pretty amazing. And you feel that you want to work harder to get better too. At the risk of sounding elitist or exclusionary, if you know what you’re watching, good Brazilian jiu jitsu or grappling can be as beautiful as dancing. Maybe even moreso, because rather than being your teammate, your “partner” is doing everything s/he can to PREVENT you from executing your move.

I’m so glad I did this. Of course it would be nicer to have emerged with a win, but I got something better: freedom from a fear that’s been hounding me for years, without me even really realizing it. I also got a terrific, fun weekend. Oh, and a pretty bad cold.

I’m lazy and tired, so I’ll post the pics tomorrow. Meantime, hooray for the experience! And now that I’m fearless, next time those middleweight chicks better watch their purses, or wherever it is they keep their game, because I’ll be coming for them! (And if they have gum in those purses, I’ll be coming for it, too!)

Old friends help to distract me

I arrived in Newark last night and had a fun reunion with Rachel (I got lost enough--in my home state, mind you--that her husband Ryan and their two sons were already asleep when I got there). Our lives are so different; she and Ryan are attorneys, have a 4- and a 6-year-old and a home, and maintain a pretty normal schedule. I, on the other hand, sleep on a couch in a sleeping bag that I pack up every morning and throw in the trunk of my car, train in this crazy martial art every day, and am lucky to get to sleep by 1am. But notwithstanding all those surface differences, we still connect, for which I am grateful. This morning we had breakfast in a cute Princeton coffee shop around the corner from their house. I'll post the pic from my own computer eventually (right now I'm on Jen's).

Before I met up with Rachel, I drove around in the wilds of New Jersey, getting myself kind of lost despite the fact that I'm from this state. I guess I just never paid attention to how you get anywhere beyond my friends' houses, my high school, and various places to shop and eat. It was interesting to be back in my 'hood; when I left this morning I thought about going by the house I grew up in and the house my parents lived in for 10 years after my sister and I went off to college. I decided not to. I figured I'd be back, and I must have sensed that I'd have a little trouble getting to Jen's place in Brooklyn, which I did, even with the Mapquest directions. So that took me a little while too. But I eventually made it.

Last night I also got to talk to Jen*, who is running the DC marathon this weekend (GO JEN*!) and Julie, who is doing great too. They both encouraged me about the competition, and talking to them--and Rachel--made me realize how little perspective I have had on jiu jitsu lately. I know lots of people want it to be their life, and I know I want it to be a big part of mine. But I also know that I need to strike more of a balance, and that will keep me saner. So I'm hanging on to my civilian friends!

This morning, after sleeping amazingly well for having napped the whole way to the east coast on the plane and lost 3 hours passing through various time zones, I made my way into Brooklyn where Jen and I met up around lunchtime (different Jen from Jen*). She has a crazy schedule lately with her job as a line producer at Fox and Friends, the morning show on the Fox network. In fact, she is asleep right now at about 6pm because she has to get to the office at 1am. So I'm going to meet up with our other friend Stimy, and maybe Woody, for dinner in New York City proper (or "the city," as it is referred to by people who are from there, even if they are in a different city when they say it) and to keep my mind off things.

BTW, all the people I've mentioned so far (Jen*, Julie, Rachel, Jen, Stimy, and Woody) are college friends. I graduated college in 1992, over 14 years ago. I feel so lucky that I keep in touch with so many people from that time, when we were all book smart and life stupid and didn't have much better to do than just hang out and use our smarts to act dumb. (As an example, I remember one Saturday night my sophomore year when some guys at a fraternity party decided to start dropping things out the 2nd floor window, starting with full cans of beer and culminating with furniture. What's amazing is how enthralled we all were with how the cans exploded and how the dresser stayed together for a split second before crunching into a pile. It wasn't malicious, either. It was moronic, but not malicious; rather, it was just exuberant).

My sister is a college friend too. I got to talk to her briefly tonight as well; by all accounts the whole family is doing well and my niece is adorable. No surprises there. And I also got to talk to a high school friend, Debbie. You may recall that she is a midwife and doctor of naturopathy in Juneau and that I visited her earlier this summer. She, too, is a keeper!

My sister and Debbie are examples of how most of these old friends have moved on to more responsible situations in life by now, yours truly obviously excepted. I mean, I still basically live in a fraternity, only this one has more Muscle Milk and Cytomax (protein and vitamin powder drinks) than beer (though there's still definitely beer), and guys who exercise more regularly than any of the guys I knew in college. But the feel is the same. The point, though, is that I have been meeting new people and, I hope, making some new friends on this trip, but it's always so nice to be with the old friends too, because even though our lives are different now, our core connections are still intact. Getting to see these old friends is part of the balance I was talking about before: I have been so jiu jitsu focused for 4 months, but the non-jiu jitsu people are equally important to me. So I'm glad they have been around yesterday and today to keep my mind off things!

Oh, and thanks to Moike for calling, for the same reasons! Always great to talk to you, and I appreciate your kind words. And thanks to Natasha for last minute advice.

Okay, now it's about 11pm. I had a great time with Stimy and took a picture with him too, that I will post eventually. It was fun despite the fact that when I told him I am still a purple belt, he said, "Wait, you've been training for a long time now, right? Why aren't you a black belt yet? Do you just suck or something?" Ouch. Asked and answered, in my opinion.

He always went by Stimy in college, but now he's starting to go more and more by Tim, his given name. Probably both because he doesn't want his girlfriends to call him Stimy anymore and also because he has a relatively new gig as a producer for The Daily Show and wants to be a little more serious. Not too serious, though, because I don't think he could be. But anyway, it was great to see him, as always. He's one of those guys who can make you crack up with just a look. I always imagine that his life is full of fun little idiosyncratic experiences that he can then parlay into screenwriting ideas (which is something he does when he's not producing segments of The Daily Show), which is basically what his life was like when I knew him in college. So he's a good one to have around. Plus, he bought me dinner! Thanks, Tim! When I saw him headed my way, I hollered "Tim!" instead of "Stimy!" so I'm learning.

We went to a Japanese restaurant called, fittingly, Dojo, where I remember going with him and some of our other friends years ago when I would visit from DC. I had healthy brown rice and steamed veggies, and they actually tasted pretty damn good with the tahini sauce Dojo is famous for. Oh, and the glass of wine. I'm thinking the wine is not really a training food, but it lowered my pulse, so that's good for the cardio. Later we got some chocolates at a little ice cream shop that also sold acai (pronounced ah-sigh-ee).

Acai is sweeping the nation lately; it's a kind of frozen desserty thing made from guarana, berries that are indigenous to Brazil. Jiu jitsu players eat acai all the time because it has lots of anti-oxidants and naturally-occurring stimulants. Plus, it just tastes good; I ate it every day when I went to Rio in 2003. It's usually blended with ice so it takes on the consistency of ice cream, and then it's topped with granola and banana slices. It's SOOOO good. Recently I have seen it at Jamba Juice and other smoothie places, and it's being touted as the next great health fad. I just eat it because I think it tastes good, but if you are in the know about acai, particularly if you were in the know before it became widely available in the states, it makes you seem cool in jiu jitsu circles. Tim ordered some but wasn't that impressed. At least, he wasn't $6.50 for a small bowl's worth of impressed. I still love it, I must admit.

On the walk to meet up with him, as I headed down 4th Street toward Washington Square, I passed some restaurants with cool names: The Slaughtered Lamb, The Four-Faced Liar, Senor Swanky's. Senor Swanky's sounds like a restaurant Ned Flanders would like: Extra tortillas? Okely dokely! I'm sure you could eat at a different place in NYC every night and never repeat yourself your entire life, especially because new places open all the time. Wow, that's a wholly different vision quest. But it's one that I'm uniquely qualified to undertake, now that I've done the first one, and have you seen my eating resume? Hmm...how does one become a professional diner out?

Okay, Jen is getting up for work at midnight. So I'll go to sleep, and tomorrow morning it's back to NJ to meet up with Felicia and Alicia at the competition hotel in Wayne. Weigh-ins are in the afternoon. I don't think I should have to cut any weight, but I guess I should weigh myself to find out. I'll do that tomorrow, after the wine, chocolate, and acai have digested. Meantime, I'll think about the words of wisdom I saw on the Dojo bathroom stall: "Act like yesterday never happened and tomorrow will never come." It's basically the same message as the quote I like from the movie Breaker Morant: "Live each day as if it's your last and one day you'll be right." Translation: Be excited about competing!

Got over myself

Okay, I have put things back in perspective and am going to compete on Saturday. I have been convinced by a lot of things/people to relax, including and especially Eben, who, when I said I was anxious about competing because it's a big tournament, said, "So?"

Good point. And I just realized that this is the ultimate pinnacle for my trip. I packed it all in 4 months ago to drive around training Brazilian jiu jitsu, and competing in a world-class competition is the climax of the play. It doesn't matter what the outcome is, but you could argue that everything has been leading up to this, whether or not I realized it, and whether or not I can hang with the competition. Felicia and Cindy helped me with some last minute details today, and I sparred a couple times kind of hard tonight, so I'm feeling as prepared as I can be, and not as worried about my cardio as I was. I'm still kind of a chunk, but maybe it's better to be at the top of the weight bracket so I don't give up too much of an advantage there. I have convinced myself. Pass the gravy.

Anyway, I leave tomorrow first thing in the morning. I fly into Newark, stay with Rachel and her family in Princeton on Wed, Jennifer in Brooklyn on Thurs, and head to Wayne on Fri morning to meet up with everyone for the weigh-in and to check into the hotel. Jennifer's thinking she'll come with me to watch! Crazy. Part of me still wishes *I* was going just to watch, but a much larger part of me feels like my fate is tied up with this dealie. Imagine how cool my book is going to be NOW!

And I am so grateful to everyone who has been encouraging me, each in his/her own way. Some people said, "Fuck you! You're competing!" Some people said, "You're going to kick ass!" Some people said, "Do what you want to do and we will support you regardless." Some people said, "Listen up, jackass. If I have to do it, you have to." And the funny thing is that every one of those comments was helpful to me at the time. So thanks very much to: Johnny, Felicia, Cindy, Jimmy, Moike, Natasha, Wen, Rudy, Tony, Marcel, Chuong, Crystina, Chrissy, Anahi, Sean, John, Vince, Nora, Andrew, and, of course, Mom and Dad.

I went with Felicia to a store called Jiu Jitsu Pro Gear after she and Cindy helped me with some technique. We had lunch with the owner, Gilberto, and I got to meet Jacare and Bibiano Fernandez, two amazing BJJ black belts who came to town to go to the Pride Fighting Championships in Las Vegas and then train a little here in LA. I had met Jacare before, but didn't bother to remind him. I'm sure he has met tons of other people in his travels and wouldn't remember me. But he will this time, if only because I have a huge shiner. Gilberto is hilarious and gave me a commemorative issue of Gracie magazine that was basically dedicated to Carlson Gracie, Sr. (my teacher, and a BJJ legend, who passed away in February) for half price. Thanks, Gilberto!

I have hives. W? T? F? I'm pretty stressed out, I guess, between the competition and deciding my next steps in life, and I got some hives back in the spring when I decided to take the trip. At that time, some of my hair also fell out and my period stopped for two months (apologies if that's too much info--it just goes to how stressed I was). Well, that stuff happened again this time, though everything's back to somewhat normal now. The hives are still there, but everything else is okay. And no, I'm not positive they are hives, but they are some kind of huge wens that contribute to my terrific look these days. Oy vey.

So tomorrow Andy, one of the students here, is coming to pick me up at 7:30 to take me to the airport. I'll buy him breakfast and then he'll drop me off. Sean said he could get me on Sunday. I should get some sleep, but first, here are some pics from the tourney last weekend.

Me, Caren, Helen, and Diana. You can't really see the mouse under my eye, but it's there. It's always fun to get pics with ladies who do BJJ. A woman named Elise came up to me after my fight to talk about training, and I gave her info about how to hook up with the Team Estrogen forum.

Wen and Steven standing, then from left: Brandon, me, Ryan, Julius, Noman, Mike, Kim. I am distracted because it looked like the lady who took our picture was 1) falling off her chair and 2) aiming the camera at things that were not us. She didn't take a dive, and she did get everyone in the pic, so I worried for nothing.

Ryan, aka Ryangle, gamely preparing to give me a matched set of black eyes. He's totally got my back. Ugh, I look every one of my 36 years in this pic. I look ROUGH. If you look closely, you can probably see the hives.

Steven, Wen, Mike and Kim. Nice pic of great people.

Okay, better get some sleep! I'll be able to sleep on the plane too, but I want to think about technique at least a little bit. Plus, I'm wiped. Didn't get to sleep till 3 this morning and then had to get up at 6 to take Johnny to the airport for his flight. So, as the kids would say, I'm outtie.

We interrupt our regularly scheduled pity party in favor of freaking out.

I lost my match at the tourney. By 2 points. She swept me. I know exactly what I did wrong, but I did it anyway and made other mistakes that made it difficult for me to recover. I'm really discouraged. I know that part of the reason is that I don't have a lot of tournaments under my belt, which is to say, more wins to counterbalance the losses so I don't care as much, but I'm bummed. Plus, what if I keep competing and keep losing? Well, I can't think that way, so I won't. Oh, and I got a huge shiner too; my opponent must have kneed me under the eye or something. So now I look like a poster child for a battered women's shelter.

The tournament itself was fun, though. I got to hang out with Mike, aka Dr. Kimura, his wife Kim, and their dog Che (as in Guevara). Mike is an avowed leftist, and he likes to intentionally piss people off on the forum with his political views. I keep threatening to register him as a Republican when he's not looking. Wen and his cousins Steven and Brandon were there too, which is always hilarious. And Santa Cruz is gorgeous, if difficult to navigate. (I guess in addition to the jiu jitsu competition, that day there was a surf competition, a marching band demonstration, and construction on one of the major downtown thoroughfares. So a trip from Mike and Kim's that should have taken about 10 minutes took about 40, which means Steven got to the venue minutes before his first match.)

I ran into some blasts from the past, including Caren, a purple belt under Claudio Franca (the tournament organizer) and frequent poster that I have met at other tournaments, Robert and Pat from Gracie Barra Alaska, and Cassio Werneck and his wife (didn't get to talk to him, but did talk to her. You might remember that she and I drilled takedowns together and she threw me, fell on top of me, and fell on her own hand, after which it swelled up. Turns out she broke the finger and just recently got the cast off. Yikes. I swear I did nothing but fall on my back and lie there.) Also got to hang out with Ryan Hall, a purple belt under Lloyd Irvin, whose nickname is Ryangle, because the triangle is becoming his signature submission. There was a forum thread once debating whether Ryan would be able to triangle Jesus. The consensus was yes. I had met him a few months ago in DC and it was fun to hang out again. He's a funny guy, and he makes jokes at his own expense. I like that because it saves me the trouble of having to do it for him. I have pics of me with all these people that I will post eventually.

After the day was over, Mike, Kim, Wen, Steven, Brandon, Ryan, Julius (Ryan's friend and a BJJ force in his own right) and I went to a bar called 99 Balloons for dinner. Don't tell my parents this, but I left around midnight and drove the 5 hours back to New Breed in the middle of the night. I wanted to get back in time to help Felicia one last Sunday morning before the Abu Dhabi trials on Saturday. I stopped for gas at about 3am, and when I noticed the attendant staring at me, I remembered my shiner and realized it looked like I was fleeing an abusive husband in the dead of night or something. The only thing missing was the kids sleeping in the car.

We had some fun with the shiner back at the academy. Greg, a purple belt who is black, and Sean, my whiter-than-white kid brother analog, and I were chatting at the academy. Greg said, "You know, if Val were to call the police right now, we'd be screwed." Sean said, "Oh, not me. I'd just say the black guy did it." Johnny wanted to give me a matching set and sign it like you would a work of art. Some of the cops who train want to write up a domestic dispute citation to protect me.

WARNING: PITY PARTY IN PROGRESS AHEAD. When I got to McCarthy's to train on Sunday morning, I had to relive the match with Felicia, Jimmy, and Rudy because they wanted to know what had happened, both with the shiner and with the loss. That bummed me out even more, and I teared up a little. I know there's supposed to be no crying in jiu jitsu, but apparently sometimes there is. The whole emotion deal is also tied up with the fact that I need to figure out my life and that's scary, so I'm trying to chalk it up to that too. But I feel like 1) I'm not getting any better at jiu jitsu and may actually be getting worse, and 2) since I'm not getting any better, what the hell am I doing on this trip? I actually demoted myself; I took my stripes off my belt. They mock me.

PITY PARTY MOSTLY OVER NOW; SAFE TO READ ON. So after feeling like crap: fat, out of shape, terrible at grappling, it is kind of hilarious that I woke up this morning to find out from Crystina that I have been accepted at the Abu Dhabi trials in the professional division.

I honestly have no idea what I'm going to do. I know there's nothing to lose by trying, but I really feel unprepared. I am by no means a world class athlete, and I just keep coming back to the fact that other people in the competition are, and they have been preparing WAY harder than I have. When I floated this logic to Felicia, before I heard anything, she said, "Don't be an idiot." Easy for HER to say! Of course I laughed at that. She's been so incredibly supportive of me since I've been here. I probably don't tell her that enough.

So anyway, I think I'm gonna take a walk and think. More later.

Headed to Santa Cruz in the morning

Leaving for Santa Cruz in about 8 hours. Planning to sleep a little between now and then, operative phrase being "a little." The referee certification course is from 4-8 on Fri (tomorrow), and then my division at the competition is Saturday at 4. There's only one other woman in my division, so it will be a short day regardless of the outcome. I'm glad about the certification course; it will make the trip worthwhile. Actually, competing will make it worthwhile, but I'm glad for the extra activity. I'm thinking it will be fun to be on the road again. Two hours into the trip I'll know whether that's really true.

It's about a 5 hour drive to SC from here, so I may not get back in time to train with Felicia and Johnny one last time on Sunday before the Abu Dhabi trials. But maybe I will. I'd like to try. I guess I'll see how I feel after competing, whether I want to make the drive then. I'm staying with Mike, aka Dr. Kimura (a BJJ finishing hold) and his wife, along with Wen and his cousins Steven and Brandon.

Haven't heard about the Abu Dhabi trials myself, so I'm assuming no news is no acceptance. I can still do the amateur division, and frankly, the more I think about it, the more convinced I am that that's where I belong. The talent in some of the qualifying divisions is amazing, and mine is not. I'm not being falsely modest, just accurate.

So it's to SC tomorrow, back on Sat or Sun, and then to NJ on Wed till the following Sun. That should be fun; I'll get to see some friends from the east coast--civilians and otherwise--and stay with Felicia and Alicia.

After that it will be November and time for me to figure some stuff out. Yoiks. It's a lot easier to just wake up, train, eat, nap, wake up, train, eat, and sleep. But all good things must come to an end, I suppose.

My cauliflower is getting better. Sean has drained it for me 3 more times because it keeps filling up again, but every time there's less and less fluid. I think he just likes sticking me with a needle because I told him he's like the brother I never wanted. And in true brother fashion, he punches me in the arm when I say it. To those of you who have admonished me (Mom, Dad, Todd), I am wearing the headgear religiously. When I wear it, I feel like the only thing missing is one of those leashes some parents put on their toddlers, but I wear it nonetheless.

Been really lax about writing up the techniques I'm learning. Been lax about a lot of things. I have notes on various techniques and will write them up someday, but for now, suffice it to say that I am playing with some half guard sweeps Johnny taught, as well as a fun full guard sweep Koda, a brown belt at Rey Diogo's school, taught me. I actually fell on Koda's shin on Tuesday while defending the same sweep he showed me. My quad landed full force on his leg and has been hurting me ever since. So I haven't been training much, just drilling technique. This could be why I'm starting to chunk up; I have put on about 2 pounds in the past week. Too much fruit plate and Panera, I guess.

Okay, I'm kind of sleepy even though I slept in till 11 this morning. Maybe I'll pack it in for now.

Running out of creative blog post titles

Friday night I went with Johnny and Sean to the Soboba Casino in San Jacinto for King of the Cage (http://www.kingofthecage.com), a mixed martial arts event that their friend Charlie Valencia fought in—he was the main event. I have seen Charlie train at New Breed, and his wrestling is amazing. Explosive, aggressive, effective. Lots of “ives.” His takedowns are everything mine are not. He has apparently been competing in wrestling and other events since he was a child.

The person Charlie was supposed to fight pulled out close to the day, so they switched in a guy named Cub Johnson, who is about 15 pounds heavier. I haven’t been to many live MMA events; in fact, the first one I went to was the one in Anchorage this past summer. For this one, Johnny was cornering Charlie, which means that Sean and I got backstage access. So that was pretty cool; we found Charlie in the red room (red for the red corner), along with all the other red corner fighters on the card. He was lying on the floor kind of chilling out, and then as it got closer to his fight time, he started warming up by hitting the pads and doing a little grappling. I mostly just tried to stay out of the way and watch.

They had a TV in the room, so after I watched these guys psyching themselves up for their fights, sometimes saying a quick prayer in a circle with their corner guys and girlfriends/wives, and heading out the door en masse, I watched them slug it out on the TV, and then I watched them come back in, sometimes with black eyes, sometimes limping, and sometimes kind of bloody.

The venue was outdoors, and it was pretty chilly out, so I was glad to be inside. The fights themselves were pretty short, with lots of referee stoppages and tapouts to submission holds, but they were exciting. One guy in the red room with a big yellow Mohawk and lots of tattoos was being dominated by his opponent, but he managed to reverse him and start raining down punches. So he eventually won. Lots of the fights were like that; they looked like they were going to go one way and then would get reversed.

Charlie lost, unfortunately, but there is some controversy about the loss and the referee’s calls. The rules of KOTC state that no competitor can kick a downed opponent, at least not in the face. But there is footage of Charlie on his knees, after having gone for a takedown, and of Cub soccer kicking him in the left side of his face. He actually tried twice, but missed the first time (Charlie slipped on some of Cub’s blood—nice—and fell, so Cub tried a roundhouse kick that went over his head). This is not to say that Cub did these things on purpose, but that he did end up breaking the rules. So I guess Charlie and Johnny are going to contest the ruling.

The fight itself was pretty exciting, though. Like I said, Charlie’s fighting style is very aggressive and fun to watch. He had some really good takedowns and realized later that he didn’t control Cub’s head enough to keep him down. He also had some good knees to the face (legal ones) and is just so fast. It was lots of fun to watch him.

Charlie and his wife, Cris, had a kind of celebratory/housewarming party afterward (they just moved into a new house), so we didn’t get back to the academy until 6am. Holy crap. I’m still recovering from the missed sleep. It didn’t help that last night we had another roommate, Greg, who doesn’t just snore, but SNORES. I was kind of worried about him because he snores so loudly, and actually suggested that he get one of those sleep tests. Saturday during the day was open mat sparring, naptime for me, and then the UFC at the academy. Sunday was training at John McCarthy’s academy and then dinking around and seeing a late showing of The Departed. Great movie.

I still haven’t drained my cauliflower ear; I couldn’t find a syringe when Jason was here; Jason’s the guy who did it last time. But he’ll be back tomorrow, so I’ll have him do it then. He keeps saying I can do it myself, which is probably true, but I’m a chicken, so it probably won’t happen. I have to say, I earned a little cache with Charlie, Sheldon (another wrestler who cornered Charlie) and Joe Camacho (a fighter who is also Charlie’s cousin) when I showed them my ear. I don’t want to keep the swelling, but their reaction was funny; it was like I had arrived or something. They were also telling hilarious stories about their childhoods, so the night flew by and like I said, before we knew it it was 5:30 am and time to get some sleep.

Today was training in the morning, sushi, naptime, and training in the evening. In the morning I trained with Marlene, a white belt who is just coming back after a 6 month hiatus. In the evening Wen, Brad, Steven, and Brandon showed up, which was fun. Class was great, as usual, and now here I am with a list of things to think about:

1. The Claudio Franca tournament in Santa Cruz this weekend (I’m planning to compete, but so far the only purple belt women signed up are me and the woman I beat at the last competition). I’m also going to take a referee certification course that’s being held the day before the tournament. That should be pretty interesting.

2. The Abu Dhabi trials

3. My next steps on my journey. I’m starting to feel like I’m overstaying my welcome at New Breed, not because of anything anyone has said, but because I’ve been here for well over a month. And it’s getting to be time for me to figure out what the heck I want to do with myself next. I’m pretty sure I’ll leave in mid-November and drive east for a month, training at various places, staying in Chicago for a couple weeks, and arriving in Florida for Christmas. No idea what I’ll do after the new year, but that will take care of itself, I hope.

4. Training tomorrow with Felicia and Johnny in the morning and with Laura at Rey Diogo’s in the evening.

5. My next steps on my journey.

6. Did I mention my next steps on my journey?

7. Did I also mention the Abu Dhabi trials?

Boy, quitting my job and driving around to all those academies seems like a cakewalk now compared to what’s coming down the pike. Well, I guess all I can do is take care of the day I’m living right now. So right now it’s time to sleep, and then tomorrow I’ll train and think about the weekend in Santa Cruz. That seems like a manageable chunk. Cross your fingers.

Decision

Okay, I decided to send in my resume. Actually, Johnny hounded me until I did. I'm still ambivalent about it; on the one hand I've been working hard, but on the other hand, this is a world class competition, and my BJJ ain't world class. Plus, I haven't been working hard enough. Well, I guess we'll see what the promoters say. No sense in jumping the gun, though I want to thank the peanut gallery for forever linking this competition and Screech's porn video in my mind. Thanks, Fat Tony and Kuan!

Indecision

I'm debating throwing my hat into the ring to compete in the Abu Dhabi trials. I think I've written about them before. Here are details: http://news.adcombat.com/article.html?id=12009.

The main reason to throw my hat into the ring is that I've been training a lot and feel like I'm getting better.

The main reason not to is because I haven't been training nearly enough to prepare for an event like this. My cardio isn't where I want it to be and neither are my takedowns.

I have my resume and cover letter written. (The resume is extremely short.) The email is written too, and the resume and cover letter are attached. The email has not yet been sent. I'll sleep on it.

Just a quick ear update

My cauliflower is back. I think it's worse. And now I have a little on my right ear. You can't see the right ear, but it's there. I have to drain it again and use the ear guards I bought. They aren't doing me any good in the trunk of my car.

Trained at Gracie Barra today. I got to drill technique and spar with Kyra Gracie, a female black belt who won the Abu Dhabi championships in 2005. She was very nice. I didn't ask for a picture with her; it didn't seem appropriate. But maybe some other time.

Not my favorite vegetable

Gross. I have cauliflower ear. I thought I wasn’t going to get it, since after 8 years of training I only had the smallest bit on the inside of my right ear and it hadn’t gotten any worse. Plus, as Greg, one of the blue belts here, said, “I thought girls couldn’t get cauliflower ear because I thought God wouldn’t let it happen.” Well, no such luck. I have it. Thanks anyway, God. Wikipedia says:

“Cauliflower ear or hematoma auris or or perichondrial hematoma is a condition common among rugby players (particularly forwards), boxers, martial artists, and wrestlers. If the external portion of the ear is constantly hit or bashed around, a blood clot may develop under the perichondrium. This separates the cartilage from the overlying perichondrium that is its source of nutrients, causing the cartilage to die. When this happens, the outer ear becomes permanently swollen and deformed. Headgear that protects the ears is worn in many martial sports to help prevent this condition. Among some athletes, it is seen as a badge of honor, a scar of experience.”

So basically, the fact that I smush my head into other people’s abdomens to put and/or keep them on the ground, that other people wrap their legs around my head while trying to cut off the blood flow to my brain, and that people’s gis routinely rub against my ears during sparring means that I have deformed myself. Note the part in the Wikipedia definition that describes how some athletes view “the ear” or “cauliflower” as a badge of honor. In fact, I know some people who cultivate the ear, and Eben, one of the black belts who trains at New Breed, is known for jumping on people who are just starting to get cauliflower and punching them repeatedly in the ear. Many jiu jitsu experts have ears that don’t look like ears anymore. They look like fists, lima beans, or fetuses, depending on your imagination and frame of reference. They are hard as rocks. They are generally disturbing.

This means that my cauliflower, as you will see, gets me very little sympathy from the guys here, and in fact gets me ridicule, because there isn’t much of it and it’s not really very visible. But it hurts and could get a lot worse if I don’t take care of it.

So here is a picture of my cauliflower ear. It’s on the left one, at the very top. Look at the right ear as a comparison.

Right ear (comparison):


Left ear (has the cauliflower):


The treatment for cauliflower ear is to drain it with a syringe. For those of you who don’t know me, I don’t like needles. I don’t faint or anything, but I whine like a baby. Jason, a purple belt who trains at New Breed, is getting pretty good at draining people’s cauliflower ear, and he agreed to do mine last night, so I spent all day yesterday dreading the needle. I know you want to see what came out of the ear after Jason drained it, and I have the pictures, but first, I will tell you about my retail therapy. I went to the On the Mat store in Hermosa Beach.

The On the Mat website (http://www.onthemat.com/) is a clearinghouse of information about grappling. There, you can find information on tournaments, belt ranks and lineages of practitioners, interviews with notable grapplers and coaches, training tips, and links to academy websites. You can also buy gear like gis, rash guards, board shorts, and DVDs. OTM also has three bricks and mortar stores in San Diego, Las Vegas, and the one in Hermosa Beach where you can buy the same stuff. I had a promotional card that I picked up at the tournament I did, and on the card they advertised that you could get 15% off your purchase if you showed new cauliflower ear. So needless to say, I wanted to get there before I drained it. They do business with John Ouano, who sells his own line of gis, rashguards, board shorts, and fight gloves (http://www.ouano.com/), as well as a cool sherpa jacket I want (see the main page). They're getting a new shipment in soon!

I ended up chatting with Nikki, who was behind the counter, and told her my story about quitting, etc. She said, “Whoa, that’s hard core!” She mentioned it to Ryan, who is one of the owners, and he gave me a pair of $50 board shorts for $20. Nice! He also gave me a bumper sticker and a couple of patches for my gi. If I bring a picture of myself in the gi with the patch on it standing on the winner’s podium at a competition into the store, they will give me something for free. That’s kind of cool incentive! They also seemed psyched that I would put on a bumper sticker because I’m going to be doing more traveling. So it was a win-win situation!

In the evening I took Johnny’s classes, which included a takedown called an inside trip and some moves from what’s called the X-guard—two sweeps and a way to take the back. Then, it was time to drain the ear. Here’s what came out:



Those two pics are two separate drainages. In other words, add up the contents of the syringe in both of those two pictures to get a sense of how much total fluid came out of the ear. And we didn’t even get all of it out. Jason said that when the fluid is bloody it means that it’s pretty new. When it’s yellow like the fluid in my ear, it’s been around for a few days. And the thing is, I didn’t even realize I had cauliflower until I woke up one day and my ear hurt for no apparent reason. That’s when I felt the sponginess—and when I started being unable to resist playing with it all the time.

Today when I saw Felicia, she gave me some good suggestions for how to drain the ear and keep the swelling down. I have to buy some heavy duty emergency splinting tape and keep it on there for 10 days or so. I also should wear the headgear I bought at On the Mat. But here is how I look in headgear.


What would you do? And when I put on the tape, it will just contribute to the “Great Dane that has just had its ears docked” look that I’m going for.

So there’s my latest adventure in jiu jitsu. I warned my parents about it earlier, but by now, they just laugh. And it turns out my dad has some from his football days. So the ear is actually a bonding thing!

Oh, and two other things. First, Moike said I could post pics of Johnny smashing him during training. Here are those:



If you were to replace Moike with me, the pictures would look about the same in terms of Johnny smashage.

And second, Felicia has her own website! Go to http://www.feliciaoh.com and see what a badass she is. She has a few pounds to cut before the Abu Dhabi trials, so my last blog post about food didn’t really do her any favors. I’m hoping this one, which shows the gnarly yellow fluid that came out of my ear, will help eliminate her appetite. Keep the faith, Felicia! I got your back.

Food: It's what's for dinner. And lunch. And breakfast. And a second dinner.

Some people might call it sad, but I call it planful: I spend a LOT of time thinking about food: what I'm going to eat next and from where. It's not compulsive in a bad, counting calories kind of way; it's just that there are so many delicious things to eat around here, and after training you get kind of hungry. So Wed evening I went to bed looking forward to the fruit plate I was going to get at the water store the next day. The water store sells smoothies and water in bulk in the shopping center right around the corner from the academy. The fruit plate is about 3 pounds of cut fruit—melon, pineapple, mango, strawberries, banana—with honey, cottage cheese, coconut, and walnuts. I don’t like walnuts, so I get the guy behind the counter to hold them and give me extra coconut. It’s so good!

Then sometimes if we train late and don’t feel like going to one of the restaurants that’s open all night, we go to Donuts and More, in the same shopping center, which is also open all night but super close, whereas the other restaurants are about 20 minutes away. At Donuts and More you can get ice cream, donuts, or a HUGE croissant stuffed with ham and cheese. That last one is a heart attack waiting to happen. And the wait is most enjoyable.

Johnny also just discovered a Panera in Whittier, which is the next town over. If you haven’t been to Panera, you’re missing out. It started as the St. Louis Bread Company and I used to go there when visiting my sister lived in Columbia, MO. Panera is only open till 9 or 10 at night, so on Wednesday I went there in the afternoon to pick up dinner for after training. I had a turkey and artichoke panini. You have to admit, this took some forethought.

And one of the all night places, Norm’s, has a great spinach salad with avocado and shrimp. I am heartsick that there isn’t any spinach these days, because that salad is damn good. There might be some by the next time we go there. Cross your fingers!

I had a great time with Moike. After I picked him up at LAX, we went back to the academy and I did the no gi class while he watched (his knee is injured and he was taking it easy). Then he and I put on our gis and sparred a little bit that way. He’s gotten better! He says I have too, but I can’t tell. He was moving pretty well notwithstanding his sore knee. We hung out a bit after the class ended, waiting for people to shower and stuff so we could lock up (and yes, it’s strange that *I* am the one locking up, but it’s also kinda cool), and then went to two more places in the shopping center that I’ve been meaning to try: Hawaiian Barbecue and Waffles ‘n’ Cream. (More planning my meals going on there.)

Hawaiian Barbecue is the name of the restaurant, but it’s also a kind of barbecue you can get around here b/c it’s close to Hawaii, relatively speaking. Typical dishes include hamburgers with gravy and fried eggs on top, spam sushi, chicken katsu, and teriyaki chicken, pork, or beef. I had a teriyaki bowl with chicken, rice, and a little salad. And everything was garnished with what looked like dry ramen noodles. Very yummy. Another staple is the macaroni salad, which I actually don’t like; it’s too creamy. I can’t believe I would ever consider ANYTHING too creamy, but the creaminess comes from mayo, and it might just be a little too much. But I made the mistake of telling people around here that I don’t like the mac salad, and now I am the object of ridicule and disgust.

After Moike finished his spam sushi, we went to Waffles & Cream. It’s probably pretty obvious what they sell there. We actually only had a scoop of ice cream each, but believe me I’ll be back to eat the crap out of a fruit-covered waffle with whipped cream. I am trying to eat a little better/less lately, because although the scale still has me at 141, I’m feeling a little chunky. So I’d better take it easy on the sweets, though I’m planning to get a ham and cheese croissant when I’m done with this entry. Well, one step forward, three steps back. The evening brought another no-gi class and more gi sparring with Moike. I have some action shots of Moike and Johnny, but won't be posting them; Moike wants to maintain his air of mystery so there won’t be any pictures of him. We kind of cut the sparring short because I pushed down on Moike's sore knee—not maliciously and not in any way that would normally cause pain, and he said it wasn’t my fault, but I still felt bad. I'm sorry, Moike! So after I broke him, I dropped him back at LAX for his 16 hour plane ride to Australia. Moike, it was so great to see you, and I’ll look forward to seeing you again at the Abu Dhabi trials in a couple weeks! (We’re both going to watch.)In the evening I was supposed to hang out with Wen and Michele in Long Beach, but Michele got sick and Wen was tired, so it didn’t happen. So I went to see Employee of the Month with Johnny and Lily instead. It was pretty funny.

But then I was tired in the morning b/c as with everything around here, we went to the movies late. Midnight show. So I didn’t get to sleep till close to 3, and I had to get up at 8 for my muscle activation therapy appointment in Long Beach. I think I’ve written about muscle activation therapy before. My friend Mike (not Moike) in Chicago worked on me a lot and it helps so much. I had been feeling increasing stiffness in my neck because of all the training and hadn’t had a treatment since I left Chicago. So I found Diane in Long Beach, who, coincidentally, is from New Jersey. She was cool and the treatment worked really well. As with Mike, I chatted with her about MAT because I’m still considering taking an internship and doing it professionally, I like it that much. Plus, with the BJJ people I know, there’d be a steady stream of injuries for me to treat! And coincidentally, there’s an internship scheduled for early next year in LA. So maybe I'll be staying. Maybe.

I got to talk to Adamarie too. I think I’ve written about her; she’s my hero. I met her at my first job out of graduate school (UNext), and she is basically a step ahead of me on the whole personal fulfillment road. I don’t mean that in a competitive way, just that she started making her changes before I did, so I get the benefit of her hindsight as she looks back on the crap I’m experiencing in the moment. And instead of quitting by degrees like I did, Adamarie quit her job cold turkey and went off to a monastery for 3 months to contemplate her navel and her next steps. Talk about making changes. Then she did her own road trip and ended up in Albuquerque, where she has been for almost 2 years. I need to visit her again! There is a cool balloon festival going on there right now; I visited her during it last year.

When I got back to New Breed, I sparred no-gi with a bunch of people at the open mat. First was Pete, who is always fun; we kind of have not serious wars when we spar. By that I mean we go all out. I do, at least. Then I sparred with Tony, who is skinny and quick. I tried a move Johnny had taught (backstepping from half guard to prevent the opponent from taking your back), got it on him at first, and then he took my back, just like I was trying to prevent him from doing. (I needed to control his head more.) Monica got me in a triangle for a couple of minutes, which helped me realize I need to drill triangle escapes. And Brian outweighs me by about 40 pounds and is strong as crap. But he didn’t use a lot of muscle, and afterward he said it was fun to spar with me because I make him think; I move constantly and in ways he’s not expecting. So that was nice feedback to get! Usually when I spar with him I just feel like I can’t do anything.

I love sparring no gi now. There were years in there when I wouldn't do no gi. I found it intimidating, partly because it seemed to attract mostly only the big dudes who are former wrestlers and/or want to fight in the UFC, and partly because even though jiu jitsu puts you in close quarters with your opponent, somehow the gi made me feel covered/protected or something. So getting used to sparring in just a rash guard and board shorts took a little doing. But now I LOVE no gi and am actually preferring it to gi lately. It's also fun to help my newfound friends prepare for the Abu Dhabi trials, which is a no-gi event. Yesterday afternoon and evening was way cool: Randy Couture did a no-gi seminar at Big John McCarthy’s academy. Johnny, Vince and I met up with Felicia there. It was a lot of fun, and Randy and John are really nice guys. Everyone who signed up for the seminar got a T-shirt and an autographed picture of them, with John (the ref) holding up Randy’s hand after he won a UFC fight. How cool is this: John’s message to me on the picture was: “Your grappling is awesome.” He was at the academy last Sunday when we were there, so he must have seen me training. Plus, he asked me if I’m going to try out for Abu Dhabi myself. Wow, if John McCarthy tells you your grappling is awesome, it is! Here are some pics:

Vince, me, Randy, Felicia, Johnny:

Felicia, Johnny, John, me, Vince:

Today Johnny, Vince, and I went back to Big John’s academy to do more Abu Dhabi preparation. I sparred a lot with Rudy and a guy named Brian, both of whom were very fun to train with. It’s amazing how quickly the days go; we started around 11, trained off and on till about 2 (interspersed with shooting the breeze) and didn’t get back to the academy till about 4:30. Johnny had asked a couple people to come and do what I’ve heard called “cooking;” where the cook-ee stays in the whole time and fights a fresh opponent every time. So Johnny fought 7 guys for 10 minutes each, with a 5 minute rest in between. Whoa. People who don’t do jiu jitsu think I train a lot. THAT is a lot of training.

So now it’s midnight on Sun and I’m halfway through a ham and cheese croissant. If I stop eating it now, I’ll be comfortably full. If. I’m basically acting as if I was the cooked one today. I just love food! It’s the best thing for eating!!

I got a call from Lacey that she’s going to be in town this week! It will be great to see her; I had so much fun with her when I stayed with her and Tallulah (her standard poodle) in Denver.

Moike is coming! (Read on to find out what a Moike is)

Nice! One of my loyal readers is a little cranky because I haven’t written in almost a week. It’s nice to be loved, so thanks for reading, Chuong! So here’s the latest entry in stream-of-consciousness form (thanks James Joyce for popularizing that).

First of all, I got a call on Tues night from Jennifer and Pat, the friends I saw on Sunday at LAX. They are engaged! I knew it was coming because Pat had emailed me asking if I knew Jen’s ring size and what she might like. I said I didn’t know her ring size but gave some suggestions on her taste. He said, “You don’t know her ring size? You mean you guys don’t try on each other’s rings?” I can’t even remember if Jen wears rings. I know I don’t. I don’t even know my own ring size, let alone a friend’s. At any rate, I am THRILLED for them and was there when the two of them were falling in love. Their first big weekend was New Year’s Eve 2004, which I spent with them and the guy I had just started to date. Things with my guy did not last. But even if I didn’t adore Pat anyway, he’d always be okay by me because after my guy and I broke up he apparently told Jen, “I don’t know what [my guy] is thinking. He’ll never find anybody who’s better than Val!” And he obviously feels that way about Jen, which makes him okay in my book.

So anyway, heartiest congratulations to Jennifer and Pat on their engagement! I love you guys and can’t wait to celebrate with you in person!

Here are the pics of us from Sunday, when Pat and I knew Pat would be proposing, but Jen had no idea and I was crapping a brick worrying that I’d spill the beans somehow. And wishing Jen would go to the bathroom so I could see the ring! Never happened.



Okay, topic shift to my exciting life (hold onto your hats): I was at the Laundromat this evening. I just didn’t feel like training today, unless you count sitting on your ass eating Thai food, sitting on your ass eating baked Lays, and sitting on your ass eating bananas “training.” And I did laundry tonight instead of during the day like normal because tomorrow Moike is gonna be here! Moike is my friend and training partner from Chicago, and he’s also pals with the New Breed guys because he trains at the one in Evanston. He’s intimately familiar with LST. I call him Moike because he’s from Australia and that’s how he pronounces Mike, which is his real name. Yes, making fun of somebody’s accent is extremely sophisticated, up there with fart jokes and boobie humor. But I have HIM calling himself that, so it’s at least persuasive.

Anyway, Moike’s gonna be here because he has a layover at LAX on his way to Australia. So I’m gonna pick him up in the morning and we’ll get back in time to take Johnny’s no-gi class at 11. Then during the day I’m sure we’ll hang out and do stupid stuff before Johnny’s 6pm no-gi class. So you can see why I don’t want to be doing my laundry tomorrow during the day: I’d either miss the training or the stupid stuff! I’m way psyched to see Moike; he’ll be the first person from Chicago that I’ll have seen in over 3 months. He keeps threatening to take a road trip like mine; I’m sure he will and I’m sure he’ll avoid me when he’s planning it because I’ll have lots of unsolicited advice.

I think I mentioned that I trained at Tim Cartmell’s place on Tues night. I forgot to mention something funny that he said. In BJJ, the energy the other person gives you, as well as the size and shape of the person, help to dictate the kinds of moves that will be the most effective against that person. So for instance, if I have long legs, a triangle choke is likely to be a high percentage move for me.

Brad and I were drilling one of the knee bars that Tim showed (a knee bar is a finishing hold where you bend the opponent’s leg backward at the knee. Sounds violent, I know. But it’s a matter of being smart about tapping and/or about locking it on.), and when Tim saw me execute it on Brad, he said, “You know, you’re the perfect size to break Brad’s leg.” Both Brad and I were happy to hear that, me moreso.

Here’s a pic of me and Tim:


Thanks to Tim for a great training session and to Brad and Wen for introducing me!

Here’s another stream-of-consciousness thing: I mispronounce *everything* around here. For instance, one of the main drags around here, Sepulveda, is pronounced Se-PUL-ve-da, not Se-pul-VEE-da, like I’ve been saying. And Hollywood BJJ is on a street called La Cienega, but it’s not pronounced See-en-AY-ga, like I thought, but rather See-EN-eh-ga. It reminds me of when I moved to Chicago and got laughed at because I pronounced Paulina St. Paul-EE-na rather than Paul-LINE-a, which is the correct pronunciation. And I always made fun of people from Delaware, who say New-ARK rather than NEW-erk, which is how you say it in New Jersey (i.e., correctly).

Thus ends the pronunciation lesson. (I wanted to use the word “orthography,” but it’s not the correct word in this context. Damn.)

So another cool thing is that on Saturday, Randy Couture is giving a seminar at Big John McCarthy’s academy, where I trained last Sunday and will train again this Sunday. Randy is a retired UFC Hall of Famer, so it will be fun to learn from him and bask in his reflected glory.

Today is my roommate Sean’s birthday. I found out this morning, so after I bought him and Ouano lunch at Thai Star, I had the perfect excuse to go to Target, which I love, to buy him a bunch of crap: silly string, Halloween candy, a whoopee cushion, soap bubbles in Spongebob Squarepants dispensers. Gonna give him all that stuff soon. So happy birthday, Sean! You little punk.

Time to find him and give him his presents!

Another wrap-up of another week

I think I’m broken. I want to return myself and get a different me, but it’s been significantly more than 30 days. Here is the litany of my injuries:

1. Tweaked right knee from when my sparrin partner heel-hooked me the other day (absolutely not her fault; I just tried to escape a little longer than I should have)
2. Tweaked left tricep from boxing class on Tues night. I probably just kept snapping my arm too straight on the jab—but the instructor said she liked my form and the flattery got to me. This is getting better, actually. I can actually hold some weight on that arm now, like when I push on the opponent to make space to get to my knees. But it hurt a lot for a while.
3. Tweaked left elbow from when Giselle armbarred me in the competition. Again, not her fault; I need to tap.
4. Sore right shoulder, probably from takedowns today during no-gi competition style sparring at John McCarthy’s academy.
5. Scratch on my face from where I hit myself while trying to arm drag my training partner. This is also much better, but I’m putting it here because it’s so silly that I hit myself in the face. Puts a different twist on self defense.
6. The mat burn on my left foot is back with a vengeance. Some from the tournament and some from training today.
7. Not-staph creeping crud. This is much better too, and I’m done with my antibiotics, but it’s not completely gone.
8. Plus, my Harry Potter/mark of the beast from when I “faced out” in Anchorage has not gone away completely. I may have that one forever.

Anyway, I guess I am what is known as “broken in.” That’s the nice way to put it. Although I do still have it going on in some ways. At the competition last Sunday, a guy came up to me and asked if I lift weights. He had seen my calves (my gi pants must have ridden up my leg, which they do sometimes while I’m training) and determined that they are muscular, which they are. I said that muscular calves run in my family, and if he liked mine, he’d love my father’s. He didn’t seem interested.

But he did tell me he wanted to photograph my legs for a women’s muscle magazine he works for. I checked out some of the pictures, and these women are BUFF. Like that scary kind of buff that I’ll never be. Just seeing them made me want to eat a quart of gravy. I don’t know if this will go anywhere, but how funny/cool would it be to be a calf model? So we’ll see if he follows up.
The days continue to fly by, taken up with training, goofing off, laundry, late night sparring and eating, and piles and piles of testosterone. My college friends Jennifer and Pat, who I saw today during their layover from DC to Hawaii, joked about how I’m basically living in a fraternity. This is true, and I know from living in fraternities because of my college experiences. The only thing that’s slightly different is that there isn’t as much drinking. There’s some, but not as much, probably because people are busy training, and when they’re done training, they’re starving, so there’s less time for drinking. But that could be because I haven’t yet experienced LST, which stands for Live Situation Training. This is something the guys here at New Breed do when they’ve gone out drinking.

Basically, this consists of them beating the crap out of each other, tackling each other in parking lots, kicking each other in the nuts, and even macing each other on occasion. The code phrase that lets you know you’re going to start some LST is “I don’t know you! That’s my purse!” from when Bobby on King of the Hill went to a women’s self defense class. So if you hear that phrase and are a guy who trains at New Breed, it’s best to grab your crotch and run like hell or look for something to throw. I heard I was going to be subjected to LST myself, but the closest I have come is having two beers with some of the guys at Oceans, and then another night doing some sparring in my street clothes. Can’t say I’m sorry not to have experienced it yet. Would love to watch, but not eager to participate.

I took Monday off. It was the day after the tournament and I was bummed about my performance. I had big plans to go to the movies during the day, but ended up napping instead. Then when the afternoon class started, I went to Starbucks and had a big old chocolate chip cookie. Bought myself some stuff at Target, talked to Julie on the phone, and otherwise blew off training. It felt great! Of course, I went back to it the next day and was happy to do it, but it was good to have a day off. In the evening Johnny and I went to see Jackass 2, but we got there too late, so we saw The Wicker Man instead. Boy, what a crappy movie. Terrible acting, misogynistic story line, awful remake of what was apparently a great 1973 film. I can never get those two hours back, or the room in my brain.

On Tuesday evening I went to train with Parker at Hollywood BJJ, Shawn Williams’ academy. I go there periodically and they refuse to take money from me, despite the fact that the training is amazing and valuable, so this time I brought them some donuts as a thank you. It’s not the best thing for people who are in training, obviously, but I figured it would be okay because people tend to take it a little easier the week after a tournament, and anyway, they have an informal mascot over there: a pound puppy named Donut. They seemed to be pleased about it. And it was great to see Parker and Emmee, who showed up for the boxing class (the one in which I punched too hard and hurt my shoulder).

What did I do on Wednesday during the day? It’s a mystery. I think it might have been laundry day. Wednesday evening a New Breed friend named Papa John came to stay. Papa John is a 58-year-old man who started BJJ 4 years ago and just got his black belt. This is an AMAZING accomplishment. In the same amount of time he has also become kind of an elder statesman of BJJ, working with committees and well-established black belts to run tournaments, streamline rules and regulations, and try out ideas for camps and getting BJJ to be accepted as an Olympic sport. He calls himself a BJJ vagabond because he is always going to this tournament or that meeting, all around the world. He also called me one, which he meant, and I took, as a compliment.

He and Johnny have had some epic BJJ battles, usually in the dead of night, at the academy. They said the longest they have ever sparred was about 5 hours. After the regular class on Wed evening and dinner at about midnight, they were at it again. And this time I got to “hang” too. We sparred from about 1:30am till about 3:30 or 4am, after which we went to 7-11, slept for not very long, and took Papa John to the airport.

Thursday consisted of breakfast over cartoons (Spongebob Squarepants), a nap, and training in the evening at Gracie Barra. I don’t know if I’ve described Gracie Barra before. “Barra” is an area of Brazil, and the original GB is located there. In recent years, more GB affiliates have cropped up, including the ones in Anchorage, Vancouver, and Seattle that I visited earlier this summer. This one is in Lake Forest, and it’s got sort of a stately feel to it, like there’s a lot of history to it. I had been there once before and felt similarly intimidated, and this time I felt the same way only moreso, because in addition to Carlos Gracie, Jr., Marcio Feitosa and Kyra Gracie were also there. They are both very accomplished black belts. I had taken a private lesson with Marcio about 3 years ago when he visited the GB in Chicago, and was pleasantly surprised that he remembered me.

The class was great, though, especially because I got to see Tim Shears again. Tim is the main instructor at the GB in Vancouver, and I trained with him when I was there. He got his black belt this week along with Papa John, and it was great to see him in it! I decided not to ask people for pictures this time around; it just felt kind of stilted and weird. Maybe next time.

Friday I went with Johnny back to Shawn Williams’ place. They were doing gi stuff, but we thought it was a no-gi class. So we did some stuff on our own and with Sean Apperson, a purple belt I’ve probably written about before.

Okay, I’m getting tired of writing. The rest of the weekend was fun: Fri night was training at New Breed and then Dave and Buster’s to play some video games, Sat was open mat in the morning, “lunch” (4pm) at Panera, video games at Nickel Nickel, and Jackass 2, and a visit from Crystina, who slept over before training today.

Today was training at Big John McCarthy’s academy in Valencia. Big John McCarthy is probably the best known referee for the Ultimate Fighting Championships, and some people went there to prepare for the Abu Dhabi trials. I think I’ve written about Abu Dhabi before. It was a lot of fun to help people prepare; we did round robin sparring while the hopefuls stayed in the whole time. It was great practice for me too!

And then this afternoon I got to see Jennifer and Pat! They are even as we speak probably in Hawaii enjoying their vacation. It was great to see them! I have pictures of the place we went to for a bite to eat, and will post them soon.

Weeks flying by

Good stuff going on. Just not making the time to write about it. Tomorrow is open mat at John McCarthy's school. Should be fun. Some people have been invited to compete in the Abu Dhabi trials. I'm psyched to get to train with them.

Watch this space for an update.