Mat rat-itude suits me

Living in the academy seems to agree with me. For the past two days, I have awakened, messed around on the computer a little bit, gone to lunch with John and Sean (Thai yesterday, Japanese today), then gone to train. Yesterday I trained with Wen, Eric (twerp), Brad (40oz) and Wen’s cousins Steven and Brandon at Eric’s school in Laguna Beach. I met up with Wen, Steven and Brandon at Wen’s office in Costa Mesa, and then we drove to Laguna Beach together.

What a gorgeous little town. Right on the water, plenty of money, plenty of attractive people. I got depressed thinking about how much the houses—and the liposuction—probably cost. The guys joked about how they play a game of counting the Mercedes and BMWs they pass on the street, and by the time they drive through the town, it’s not uncommon to have reached a hundred. Some of those houses, too; they are what my mother would call “starter castles.”

Eric’s school is in a spa/gym that overlooks the water. He is a personal trainer in addition to being a jiu jitsu instructor, and that means that he’s really smart about targeting drills and things to jiu jitsu in ways that work your entire body. One drill he had us do is this crazy wiggly thing where you lie on your back and use your hips and shoulders to shimmy yourself sideways down the mat. He made it look so easy, and when I tried it, it looked like I was being electrocuted. I can do it better in a circle, which is how Eric said to drill it.

We spent most of the time drilling and sparring rather than working technique, so I got to spar with most everybody, including Brandon, a brown belt; Wen, a brown belt; and Eric, a purple belt who should probably be a brown belt. Eric has a female white belt, Alex, training with him, and it was fun to talk to her because she’s very excited about BJJ. I gave her my contact information and instructions on how to access Team Estrogen, the online forum I post on with other women who train. We sparred too, and I just let her play and gave her some openings to see what she would do with them. She’s only been training for a month, and she’s getting things down! I hope she sticks with it.

Here are pics of Eric with all his students:

Top row: Alex, me, Eric, Joe, Wen, Brandon. Bottom row: Chad, Brad, Steven.

Eric also gave me a t-shirt from the academy in Hawaii run by his brother, Kendall Goo, who is a black belt under Renzo Gracie. According to him and Wen, this shirt makes me look like a Hawaiian redneck. Sweet! Now I just need to pick up some pidgin like “paka” and “faka” (No clue what those mean.) and I will TOTALLY pass as Hawaiian.

Today I had sushi with John and Sean (sensing a pattern here?). Then in the evening, true to form, I met up with Jimmy for training at Jean Jacques Machado’s in Tarzana and Eddie Bravo’s in Hollywood. JJM is one of 5 Machado brothers who are cousins of the Gracies, the family to whom you want to be able to trace your instructor’s and your own lineage when it comes to legitimate BJJ training. JJM is arguably the most technical of the brothers, who also include Roger, John, Rigan, and Carlos. They are friends with Chuck Norris, who is a student of theirs, and who has had them appear on episodes of Walker, Texas Ranger. They were also in a shoot-em-up kind of movie called The Boys from Brazil. Low production values, high entertainment values.

At JJM’s, I worked technique—a series of sweeps from the butterfly guard—with Jimmy, who is a tough purple belt. I also got to spar with Jeannette Portocarrerro, a brown belt. Hooray, another female brown belt! I held my own against her, I’m happy to say. And some of the other students I sparred with said my technique was solid. I’m always very glad to hear that!

Here is a picture of Jeannette, me, and Jean Jacques Machado, 4th degree (I believe) black belt under Carlos Gracie.


Then it was on to Eddie Bravo’s Legend’s academy in Hollywood. Eddie is a black belt under JJM’s brother John. He is a flamboyant guy, best known for tapping out Royler Gracie in a no-gi match. Until he did that, it was pretty much unheard of for a non-Gracie to tap out a Gracie. He only does no-gi these days, and has articulated his reasons extensively. (I don’t remember what they are. :) He is also known for his signature move, the Twister, which is a wrestling move he introduced into his game just to see if it would work. I got twistered while sparring. It was pretty sweet! One of Eddie’s students is Joe Rogan, who is the host of Fear Factor as well as a commentator for the UFC. But my favorite of his roles (and probably my sister and brother-in-law’s too), was Joe Gorelli on News Radio. Hilarious show.

I felt like a moron in Eddie’s class, first because they were on the last day of two weeks of working on a particular set of moves (so he was busting through them pretty quickly), and second because he has come up with his own names for the moves, most of which I had never heard before, and which include T-Rex, Jew Claw, Crackhead Control. I had heard that he has his own names for things, and that there are people who deride him for it, but all I cared about is that I felt awkward.

What was bad is that I sparred with a really young kid who spazzed on me and cranked my neck REALLY hard. It’s fine now, because Jimmy worked on it with some funky acupressure, but what I think happened is that I was giving the kid a harder time than he was expecting, so he went “aggro,” as the SoCal folks would say. He felt glad, and I have to say I’m glad about that, because maybe it will make him think twice before he does it again. My lesson is that BJJ is great and fun and obviously is rooted in self defense, but I got to see first hand some of my limits. Good reminder.

Anyway, here is a pic of me and Eddie.

Okay, I think I’m pretty much caught up with my blogging now!

Almost caught up

Whew! I'm all caught up on my training journal notes and have blogged about last Thurs and Fri. Tomorrow I'll report on this past weekend and what's been going on this week. The biggest part of it is the pictures; there are tons and they take forever to load. But I'll just keep trundling along.

Today was a good day; woke up at John's academy after a pretty restful night. Got a pastry for breakfast from the Mexican bakery down the street and spend the morning dinking around on the computer. At lunch I went with John, Sean (my roommate) and a student named Greg to Thai Star, where I had mussumun curry. Delicious! Tonight I trained with Eric, Wen, and Brad from the forum at Eric's school in Laguna Beach. Extremely fun, especially when Eric gave me a t-shirt that I think according to him makes me a Hawaiian redneck. Nice!

Headed to sleep, but tomorrow I'll post pics like nobody's business! :)

I am officially a "mat rat!"

I am here in John Ouano's academy in Santa Fe Springs, getting ready to go to sleep after a student finishes cleaning the mats. I'll be sleeping in style on one of the couches in the office in my sleeping bag. There's another student staying here, Shawn, so it kind of sucks for him to have to share now. But he seems cool, and it's not like I'm the roommate from hell. Or so I believe about myself.

Brian and Chrissy left this morning at the ass crack of dawn (that seems to be my favorite phrase lately), so I've been up since about 4am. Before I trained really hard (3 hours of both wrestling takedowns and BJJ), I spent the day in a coffee shop blogging my little heart out, and yet I still have Sat-Mon to cover, not to mention notes to write up in my training journal since I arrived in LA: training with John Ouano Thurs, Shawn Williams @ Hollywood BJJ Fri, Joe Camacho at Ouano's on Sat, back to Shawn's last night, and back to John's tonight. Tomorrow I'll train with Wen and Eric, two of my pals from the forum, at Eric's school. Thurs it's to Jean Jacques Machado's and then Eddie Bravo's with Jimmy the Metrosexual, and then Fri I have no plans. But that will undoubtedly change.

And then Sat I fly to Florida for two days with my parents, sister, brother-in-law, and niece! Hot damn. I'll get to see for myself how my mom is doing since her surgery, how my dad is doing being a rock for her, and how my sister and her family are settling into the school year (they are both English professors. Plus, my niece just started 2-year-old school! :)

Okay. I'm being treated to the Latino Love Hour, which will lull me to sleep, I hope. Did I mention how amazing John Ouano is for letting me stay here? And he doesn't care that I'm training at a bunch of different places. I'm gonna pick up some breakfast for him and the other mat rats tomorrow morning. But right now I'm gonna crash into something if I don't crash soon.

Down-to-earth glitterati and curry in a hurry

Poor Chrissy. She was falling asleep last night (Sunday) back at Belle’s and had to drive us back to the hotel. AND then she had to be at work this morning by 6am. It was completely unfair, especially the part where I slept till 9:30 and Brian slept till noon. I had been thinking about hitting a noon class at Hollywood BJJ, but talked to Parker and we decided to go in the evening instead. We were planning to meet up with Jimmy for Japanese curry at a place called Hurry Curry, followed by boba tea, and figured we could squeeze in a workout too. This time, Chrissy was able to join us, which was great.

So after kind of a lazy afternoon of laundry and amusing chit-chat (e.g., Brian didn't want to put his suitcase in the trunk of my car because it'd be right in the "kitchen"), Brian and I met Chrissy back at the hotel and set out for Hollywood BJJ. We got there a little early, in time to wake Parker from his nap on the academy couch and to chat a little with Sean Patrick Flanery, an actor who is also a purple belt under Shawn Williams (who runs Hollywood BJJ). Sean has been in a lot of films and TV shows, maybe the best known being Powder, a movie about a powdery white guy who may or may not be an alien.

SPF was way cool. Very down to earth, with no celebritude at all. He had his dog, Donut, with him, a cute pound puppy who looks very pit-bullish. Since all of us there are avid dog-lovers (and Chrissy is an experienced dog trainer), we almost paid more attention to Donut than to him. Anyway, I COULD tell you that at one point Sean Patrick Flanery had me in his guard and was guillotine choking me, but I won’t. I was so chill I didn’t even force him to take a picture with me. I figure if he is there on Friday when I go back for an open mat with Parker, maybe I’ll ask him then. And of course Donut would have to be in the picture too.

Oh, and speaking of celebrities, Chrissy, Brian and I also saw the guy from Yes, Dear in the parking garage. The one who wears the baseball cap. He was carrying Gatorade and asking somebody to hold the elevator. Just plain folks! It seemed like none of us was really all that enamored of the Hollywood scene; I happened to look up once in the car and point out the Hollywood sign, but it’s funny how I’m more impressed with accomplished BJJ players than actors.

Speaking of which Sean Apperson, an accomplished purple belt under Shawn, taught the class tonight, with SPF helping every now and then. Oh, and there is another purple belt Shawn at the academy too. Good lord. Anyway, it was a great technique class, and then afterward I jumped into the conditioning class. Always good to test my conditioning. I did okay, with more coordination problems than cardio ones. Eight years of BJJ has given me a little more sophistication in terms of my body awareness, but there’s always room for improvement!

Here’s a pic of me, Sean, Chrissy, Brian, Parker, and Emmee. Emmee’s daughter took the pic. Thanks, Emmee’s daughter! You're the coolest.

Me, Apperson, Chrissy, Brian, Parker, Emmee.

After class we met up with Jimmy, who had been away all weekend at a wedding. Here we are at Hurry Curry:

Emmee, Brian, Chrissy, Parker, Jimmy, me

And here we are at the boba tea place. I’m not entirely sure how to describe boba tea if you haven’t had it before. It’s called “bubble tea” sometimes too, and I don’t know if there really is tea in it at all. It’s kind of like a smoothie or milkshake, and the boba refers to balls of tapioca that you sip up through an extra-wide straw along with the “tea.” The goal, according to Parker, is to drink the tea and eat the boba at the same pace so that you’re not left with too much of one or the other at the end. Kind of like having enough raisins left in your Raisin Bran, I guess. You can also get jellies in your tea, which are just what they sound like: little pieces of jelly in different flavors. Parker got almond jellies in his.

Here are Chrissy, Brian and Emmee enjoying their boba tea,


Parker probably giving Jimmy a hard time about his very nice (but very metro) shirt:

and my hazelnut boba. I am on the fence about this whole tapioca balls dealie. They are chewy and kind of flavorless, and that scares me a little. So I had some of them and left most of them in the cup. But look at me being open minded!

We had to call it kind of an early night because Chrissy, Brian and I have to be up early early tomorrow so they can get to the airport for 7am flights. I will park it at a coffee shop for most of the day and then train at and move into John Ouano’s in the evening! Wow, I’m gonna be a true mat rat!

About the weekend

Yesterday Brian and I trained at John Ouano’s again. There was an open mat where I got to spar with John (he laughed and poked fun at me the whole time. I said, “I can see why your students love you so much.” He just laughed harder.) and with Joe Camacho, a brown belt under Aloisio Silva who brings some of his students to John’s every now and then.

Some of you may recall that I have been complaining about getting stuck in a position called the “turtle” while sparring. It means I am on my elbows and knees trying to keep my opponent from grabbing my collar across my throat or rolling me to my side. Joe had some good ideas for getting out of the turtle position that he showed me after we finished rolling. Some really good things there!

I didn’t take a picture with Joe because I’m planning to visit his academy one of these days and I’ll do it there. (Good lord, there are probably hundreds of academies in Southern California. I keep hearing about others I need to try, and it’s exciting and daunting at the same time.)

In the afternoon, Chrissy, Brian and I stopped by Stan’s Donuts, a Southern California institution in Westwood, on the way to picking up Parker, Emmee, and Emmee’s daughter so we could all go together to a BBQ at Rude Boy Johnny’s house in Palos Verdes Estates. Rude Boy Johnny is the screen name of Johnny, one of the people we know from nhbgear.com/jiujitsugear.com. The BBQ is an annual event, and this time it included some of us who are in from out of town. The idea is to get together, train a little jiu jitsu, watch the UFC, and eat! Chrissy wanted to get Stan’s because she is the newest member of Team Donuts, a bunch of us who train sometimes and eat donuts more frequently than we train. I have a patch on the seat of a pair of gi pants, because that’s where donuts usually end up anyway. At least for me.

Stan's is famous for crazy flavors like peanut butter and banana, cinnamon and chocolate, pineapple upside down, and blueberry cheese in addition to the more typical crullers and jelly filled. Wen (see pictures below) tried a peanut butter and banana and said it was so good it broke his mouth. Love that description. It's pretty accurate too; after a Stan's donut, your mouth kind of balks at eating anything less delicious.

I had actually had Stan’s before. Maybe 3 or 4 years ago, shortly after I joined Team Donuts, Karlinhos and I did a donut exchange. I sent him two dozen apple cider donuts from an orchard in downstate Illinois, and a few months later he sent me two dozen Stan’s. Those of you who have never had an apple cider donut: rectify the situation immediately! They are a delicious harbinger of autumn, my favorite season. As I have discussed with Jimmy, they are more of a minimalist’s donut, with subtle flavor and cakeyness. Stan’s are more flamboyant donuts. There is a time and a place for each. It was pretty funny bringing those donuts, still warm, to the post office and working with the lady behind the counter on the best way to package them. When I commented on that, she said, “Honey, nothing surprises me anymore. You should see some of the things people want to send to each other.” The point is, I knew what we were in for when we bought the donuts. It was the first time I had actually BEEN to Stan’s, though. And I didn’t get to meet the man himself. So there is a goal for next time.

I’m going to let the pictures speak for themselves on this one. Suffice it to say it was a terrific BBQ and I was so happy to meet all the people from the forum!

Here is a pic of me and Chrissy with Felicia Oh. Felicia is a BJJ black belt under Jean Jacques Machado. There are very few female black belts in the world, and I was not going to let the opportunity pass for me to get a picture with her! She was very gracious and nice about my fawning over her. I may also get to train with her while I’m in LA, as I mentioned earlier.

Here is a pic of Wen and Parker, who are the president and vice president of Team Vile. Team Vile is another silly forum thing that evolved into a full-blown entity, complete with patches, a web page at http://www.teamvile.com (or at least the threat of a web page; there’s no content there yet), and dozens of members. So many silly shenanigans happen on that forum, and this was one of them. Members of Team Vile have silly titles, like Director of Misinformation, Director of Karaoke, Janitor, etc. I don’t have my patches yet, but I will be getting them soon, and then they’ll go on my gis.


Here is a pic of the entire group (forum names in parentheses), minus Rudini and Felicia, who had to leave early.

Camera guy: Kenny (Ze Great Escojido). Sitting on the top of the couch: Eric (twerp), Johnny (Rude Boy Johnny), Nick (David Jacobs' Bouncy Penguin).

Next row: Brad (40oz), Michelle (bellebjj), Parker (HPF), Jeff & Stacia (not on forum), Karl (Karlinhos, in chair).

Next row: Emmee (HPF GF), Wen (Wen), Andres (Loco Sano), me (valhalla), Brian (Brain), and Chrissy (clinzy) in the front.

Brad and Brian talking politics (I think. There was a political discussion going on outside, but Michelle, Chrissy, Emmee and I wisely avoided it, staying inside to chat on the comfy couches.)

Me, Emmee, Rude Boy Johnny, Chrissy, and Michelle:

RBJ is hilarious. I was talking to him as he was changing his 3-year-old daughter’s diapers, and interspersed between obviously sincere and impassioned comments about how important his kids are to him, and chatting with his daughter about her blankie and why she didn’t finish her cookie, he dropped F-bomb after F-bomb. His daughter took it in stride and I just laughed. And apparently during the political discussion he would get so worked up that he spat everywhere.

Wen and Randy Bloom, a black belt surfer dude who was wearing a T-shirt saying “Most Likely to Bogart.” Randy recently promoted Wen to brown belt! Plus, it was Wen’s birthday on Friday, so RBJ and Mrs. RBJ got him a cake. Happy birthday, Wen!

Karlinhos, Andres, and Kenny:

Andres I had met once before when I was visiting other friends in NYC, which is where he has lived until recently. He took a motorcycle trip from New York to the southern tip of Argentina and documented it in a book called Odyssey to Ushuaia (I have a signed copy!). He’s doing a somewhat shorter trip this summer and then heading to Argentina for a couple months. So it was fun to compare notes on our respective journeys. This time he’s still looking to publish, but he’s just writing about things that strike his fancy and doesn’t have too set an itinerary. Sound familiar? I told him about the crazy place in Genoa, CO, that’s run by the elderly man who has all kinds of STUFF and the tower that looks out on 5 states. I figured he could probably do it justice where I didn’t. He dutifully wrote it down, but I’m sure he’ll also find other interesting things to write about.

The next day Brian, Chrissy and I slept IN! We had had the option of training early with Rudy (Rudini from the forum—I didn’t get any pics of him at the BBQ), Felicia, and Cindy Omatsu, another female black belt. We were really tempted, but sleep and champagne brunch won out. Fortunately, I will be able to try to make a Sunday training session with them before I leave LA.
Later in the day, we went to Long Beach to hang out more with Michelle, Wen, and Brad. The BBQ was terrific, but with the UFC, the number of people there to talk to, and the fact that we were super late b/c of traffic, it felt like we didn’t get to TALK as much as we wanted to. So we were glad to get to hang out with them again. We shot the breeze for a couple hours at Michelle’s place and then drove to Seal Beach to see some of the scenery. Here are Wen, Brad, Michelle, Chrissy, and Brian in front of the beautiful ocean. Notice Brad “repping hard” with his Team Vile t-shirt.

Afterward it was on to an Irish pub for dinner (does carrot cake count as dinner? That’s what I had.) Wen, Michelle, Brad, me, Brian, Chrissy.

And back to Michelle’s where we met up with Wen’s cousins Brandon and Steven. Brandon is a brown belt and Steven is a white belt just starting out, but with Wen and Brandon as his teachers, he’s making great progress. They had heard about my odyssey from Wen and wanted to meet me. (I love groupies!) Everyone I meet has an interesting story about how they came to BJJ, so I always end up wanting to hear about their journeys (b/c we’re all on a journey even if we don’t physically travel, right?) more than I want to talk about mine. Here are Wen, Brandon, and Steven.

So it was a great weekend, courtesy of the west coast nhbgear.com/Team Vile/Team Donuts contingent!

Whoa, lots going on!

No time to do a proper post these days! I'm in LA and having a lot of fun training and hanging out with friends. I have pictures galore and lots to write about, and am taking notes on what's happening next. So probably after the weekend I'll have pages and pages!

Driving, training, eating sushi

Today I took my friend Brian on a wild goose chase. Chrissy had to get to work, but Brian, her husband, was arriving at LAX in the morning. I happily agreed to go get him, because he’s as cool as Chrissy, and that’s saying a lot. Everything was fine for a while: I found LAX, Brian’s flight was on time, we found each other, his luggage came off quickly, etc.

That’s when all hell started to break loose. Well, I should say that all heck started to break loose, because while what happened was a nuisance, it wasn’t a huge tragedy or anything. It’s just that I ended up taking Brian on an impromptu tour of southern California. Somehow I missed the highway I needed and we drove in a big circle around a lot of the city.

This was another indication that the highways in this state are not as hospitable as in others. My first couple of indications were back in Sacramento, where there aren’t always listed exit numbers on the highways—the lack of them made me realize how much I had come to rely on them—and where the exits don’t tell you what you can find there. In other words, in other states an exit sign will have a picture of a knife and fork if you can find a restaurant there, a bed if you can find a hotel or camping, etc. In Sacramento, I drove around for about an extra half hour because I wouldn’t see any pictures and then by the time I saw that there actually WAS a hotel, I was past the exit. Then I took an exit that, of course, didn’t have any hotels and had to get back on the highway.

Add to this the fact that there are about 20 highways in the LA area, all of which must be called “The” X (like “The 5” or “The 710”), and it makes me pretty sure that when you establish CA residency you get a secret packet of information that helps you navigate the entire state without any problem. Those of us who are just visiting are major suckers who may as well have “Loser from out of Town” stamped on our foreheads.

So that took up most of the morning. In the afternoon, I did laundry while Brian took a nap. He had had to get up at the ass crack of dawn to catch his flight, and wanted to rest up a little. We were hoping that Chrissy would be able to come with us to train at Hollywood BJJ with Parker, but no such luck. (It’s really irritating how work gets in the way of the important stuff.) So it was just me and Brian, driving down Wilshire Boulevard. Knowing that we were in THE Hollywood (no, not mistaking it for a California highway, just emphasizing that we were there) left both of us kind of cold/unexcited, other than the getting to train part. I mean, there are famous people and things, but I remember having the same feeling when I saw the Mona Lisa in person: Wow, this looks like all the pictures I’ve ever seen of the Mona Lisa. So we were definitely not starstruck.

When we arrived, Parker introduced us to the main instructor at Hollywood BJJ, Shawn Williams, a black belt under Renzo Gracie. My friend Darin, whom you may remember from the Submit Pit in Somerset, KY, had told me that if I didn’t stop by Shawn’s academy he would never speak to me again. He and Linh spent a month living in LA so he could train there, he liked the instruction so much.

Shawn did not disappoint. There is a debate among jiu jitsu dorks about whether the Americans who are up and coming are better instructors than the old guard Brazilians. I don’t know the answer, but I do know that Shawn’s instructional technique is very detailed and descriptive; things stick when he explains them. Plus, he’s a nice guy (are you sensing a pattern here re: BJJ people??). I got to spar with Brian and Parker, as well as a tough young blue belt named John.

Here are the obligatory pics. Shawn had already changed into his street clothes, but just imagine him in a gi and a well-deserved black belt and you’ll get the idea:

Me, Shawn, Brian:

Me, Parker, Brian:

After class, Chrissy, Emmee, and Emmee’s lovely 11-year-old daughter met up with us for a Friday night sushi ritual. No it wasn’t a weird ritual, just something Parker, Emmee, and Emmee’s daughter do every Friday. They have been there so many times that Emmee’s daughter gets to ring up their check, and the sushi chefs are constantly cooking up (pun intended) new things they think they’d like. I am allergic to/dislike fish, though I do like veggie sushi, and the chef who made my hand rolls put as much care into them as the other chefs did into the amazing creations they put forth for the rest of the group. I also had some green tea and black sesame ice cream. Amazing!

On the way back to the hotel, Brian, Chrissy and I realized that we have crushes on Parker, Emmee, and Emmee’s daughter; we like the real them (in addition to the forum them) so much that we want to go on a third date. Fortunately, we will all be at a BBQ tomorrow that another forum member, Rude Boy Johnny, is throwing. We hope they like us as much as we like them and are tempted to ignore them a little so they don’t know how bad we’ve got it. Please don't tell.

Hospitality, celebrities, and socializing, BJJ-style

Today was a BANNER day. BANNER. After futzing around for way too long and getting very little sleep the night before due to said futzing, I hauled ass down through California. I was scheduled to meet my friends Chrissy and Jimmy for lunch, thereby kicking off a weekend of training, socializing, and donnybrooking in LA with people from the forum. I have been lucky enough to hang out with Chrissy and her husband Brian a lot before, like in person, so they are actual friends of mine. This is good, because it enabled me to mooch off of them all weekend (they came from Richmond, VA, where they live, Chrissy for a business trip and Brian for fun and vacation, and Chrissy’s company put them up in a hotel room in Pasadena that they kindly shared with me). Jimmy I had emailed/texted, spoken with on the phone, and crapped on repeatedly on the forum, but never met.

That changed after I drove about 5 hours and 300 miles through central California to meet up with them at a Van Nuys In-N-Out Burger. (As an aside, central California has many areas that could be described as “BFE,” or, as my more genteel mother would say, “East Jebeep.” I guess I knew that not all of CA was as populous/popular as LA and SF, but it was funny to see the kind of wasteland-y areas for myself. For instance, I was trying to talk to my dad and the call kept dropping because I was driving through sort of rolling hills and industrial parks. Who knew?) Neither Chrissy nor I had ever eaten at one, though somebody gave me a T-shirt once, and it’s kind of a California institution. Well, California, Nevada, and Arizona. But the point is, we had never eaten there and wanted to do as much California stuff as we could. So eat we did, including something called “animal fries,” which are French fries covered with Thousand Island dressing and “cheese.” “Cheese” is in quotes because it was that liquidy cheese that goes on movie theater nachos. I had a cheeseburger too. Chrissy had a hamburger, and Jimmy had a double-double.

Here are pics of us in front of that famous sign. In this first one, may be able to make out that my t-shirt says "nhbgear." As the kids would say, I'm reppin' hard.

Jimmy and Chrissy. (Jimmy is frequently ragged on for dressing "metro.")

The rest of the banner day went like this: After a great, 2-hour lunch with Jimmy, Chrissy and I maneuvered Los Angeles traffic and checked in to her hotel, the lovely Westin in Pasadena. Then we hightailed it to New Breed Academy, run by John Ouano, to train. New Breed is part of both Chrissy’s and my BJJ families; I could go into the lineage here, but it might get confusing. Anyway, there are numerous New Breed branches, including Chris Woolford’s in Portland where I went earlier in the week. Because of traffic, we were late to class, which I have already mentioned I HATE. So we were a little nervous about coming in, but about 2 minutes after he met us, John had 1) insulted us both, 2) offered to let me stay in his academy after Chrissy and Brain went home, 3) insulted us both some more, 4) laughed at us, 5) been so incredibly friendly and welcoming that we felt like we had known him for years.

You can see from the pics how uptight and standoffish he is, and how seriously he takes himself.



Good lord, I felt like I was hanging out with a family member! It was great.

I couldn’t believe that he was honestly offering me a place to stay, but he was. So I took him up on it and will move in on Tues. We had a great training session, and then he mentioned off-the-cuff that Vitor Belfort was coming over. Well, for those of you who don’t know, Vitor Belfort is a BJJ phenomenon who crossed over into MMA. In other words, he is pretty famous in grappling circles. When he mentioned that, Chrissy and I both thought he was joking, because we hadn’t yet figured out when he’s joking and when he’s being serious.

But he was being serious!!! (Spoken in stage whisper: That's Vitor Belfort! Sporting his Rocky Balboa look, as John said.)


And Vitor was nice enough to pose for those pictures with us even though he was trying to talk on the phone. Very nice guy, like most everyone I have met since I’ve been on my trip.

After training, we hightailed it to a place called The Shack in Hollywood, where we met up with some of the other forum types, most of whom we hadn’t met before. It’s so funny to meet these people, because you spend so much time interacting with them that you feel like you know them. And in some ways you do. But seeing them face-to-face is always a riot. And these were to be some of our tour guides for the weekend!

Here are Greg (the Train on the forum--gotta include the forum names b/c that's how I know most of these people!) and Emmee (HPF GF):


Rod (Sweepem):
Left to right: Joe (Creek Warrior), Chrissy (clinzy), me (valhalla), Rod, Greg, Emmee, Parker (HPF)

Then it was back to the hotel to get some rest before the next crazy day. I went to sleep happy!

Blowing through California

Did lots of driving over the past couple days. LOTS of driving. And not much else. Today I trained in Carmichael, CA (near Sacramento), with Cassio Werneck, who won a world BJJ competition called the Mundial in 2003, and Marcos Torregrossa, a brown belt under Cassio who posts on nhbgear.com as Yemaso Yankee. Marcos did a seminar that some of my friends went to, and showed a choke that was nicknamed the “Oh, Jesus,” because it was so tight. I sparred with Marcos this morning and he kicked my ass six ways from Sunday. Always a pleasure. Truly. Plus, he gave me a couple good suggestions for escaping from an armbar that I tried later in the day.

I also worked with Cassio’s wife, a blue belt whose name is Ouisa. She and I were working takedowns, and when she shot in to take me down, she lost her footing, slipped and fell on my head, and broke her own finger. Yikes. I felt really bad, but the only thing I actually did was break her fall, which is good. It just always stinks when someone gets injured and when you have even a little involvement in it. She didn’t hold it against me, and she felt really bad about falling on my head. But I always chalk up minor injuries—like the scrape on my forehead, the mat burn on my chin, the jammed thumb, and the bruises I currently have—to assumed risk/occupational hazard. As my teacher Carlson, Jr., says, “Valeria, this isn’t ballet!”

I was really irritated with myself later in the day; I cruised back to Cassio’s after spending the afternoon at Starbuck’s, ready to take the evening class. Well, I thought it started at 7, but it was actually at 6. I hate being late to class anyway, and when I’m a guest in someone’s academy, I hate it even more. Cassio didn’t mind and just told me to suit up, but it’s still a drag! So I rolled in around 6:45 in time to miss one technique and see another. But I did get to spar for about a half hour, and that was lots of fun. I worked technique with a group of women, including a blue belt named Joy, a white belt named Debra, and a green belt named Nicole. (Normally there aren’t green belts, but I think there are for children, so Nicole must have been under 18.) I always love to work with women, because, as I have mentioned, there are so few of us. Fortunately, there were no mishaps with this group! Joy and I exchanged contact info, and I’m hoping she’ll register at nhbgear.com, specifically the women’s forum.

I also got to chat with Cassio, and when I told him more details about my trip, he was really excited for me. He said that he encourages his students to go to other academies as well, that it can really help to round out your game because you get to train with people you aren’t familiar with and they give you different energy. He’s also got big plans to expand the participation of women in his academy beyond self-defense, which is why they usually get into it. As he said, the self-defense aspects are extremely important, but his goal is to get at least some of his female students to the point where they love to train because BJJ is a fun mental and physical challenge. (That’s where I am with it.) He also said I’m “very good” at BJJ. And if Cassio Werneck tells you you’re very good at BJJ, you are! Of course, I doubt he’d tell me I suck, but it was an unsolicited comment, so I’m going with it! So on balance, it turned out to be a great class.

Thanks to Cassio, Marcos, Ouisa and the rest of Werneck’s World Class Jiu Jitsu in Carmichael, CA, for their hospitality! And now for the picture of me and Cassio:

I'm blowing through CA, because I got places to be. Tomorrow I'm meeting up with forum friends, some whom I've interacted with in person and some whom I am excited to interact with in person after interacting with them on the forum. I gotta get to LA by lunchtime to connect with Chrissy and Jimmy, and then the rest of the weekend will bring more opportunities to hang out and train!

Writing another lengthy post

Did lots of driving over the past couple days. LOTS of driving. And not much else. Today I'm training with Cassio Werneck in Sacramento, who won a world BJJ competition called the Mundial in 2003 (trained this morning and am going back in about an hour for the evening class) and Marcos Torregrossa, a brown belt under Cassio who posts on nhbgear.com. I sparred with Marcos this morning and he kicked my ass six ways from Sunday. Always a pleasure. And on Monday I got to train with Chris Woolford in Portland again. PLUS, I got to see James, another friend from nhbgear.com. He drove 2 hours up from Eugene to train with me. And he brought me Gatorade! How cool is that?

He is a great example of on-line friendships that translate well into real life. I met James on nhbgear.com, and after about 4 years of posting about complete ridiculousness with him and others, hanging out with him on Monday was the 2nd time I had ever seen him in person. And we had a ball! Here’s a pic of us, with him looking handsome and me looking like ass. That was after getting not very much sleep the night before and anticipating another 4 hours of driving that night.

Mon night after class at Chris' I drove 4 hours south to Medford, OR. Got to sleep around 3 and was on the road again by 9. I met up with my friends Nora and Jon, who live in Guerneville, CA, and it was about a 7 hour drive from Medford. We had a terrific dinner and I got to see their cute town, which is in the heart of CA wine country. Then I drove 2 hours to Sacramento and stayed up late again futzing. Why do I do that? It was a total of about 500 miles in 24 hours. Whoa.

Anyway, so I'm a little punchy and behind in my posting. And tomorrow I drive to LA to meet up with MORE forum friends, including Chrissy, Brian, Wu, Wen, HPF, and tons of others. It should be a fun weekend! And it won't be conducive to posting either! (Here's that dilemma again: I have to experience things to be able to write about them. But I also want to remember what I experience. Rock and hard place.)

I have pics from yesterday and Monday, so I'll get on that eventually. Right now I gotta compose myself and get back to Cassio's academy.

Visiting Nora and Jon

Today I took a twisty, turny drive through California wine and olive country to see Nora and Jon. They live in Guerneville in a beautiful hilly, tree-protected area near Robert Louis Stevenson State Park. Their home is bright and airy and features many places to sit outside and enjoy the breeze, the hummingbirds, and Nora’s secret recipe iced tea.

I first met Nora and Jon in Chicago when we were all living there. She is a channel, he is a musician, and they are both reiki masters. For my 33rd birthday, my friend Julie got me a channeling session with Nora. I had been to palm and tarot card readers in the past and fancied myself open to psychic information, notwithstanding the cheesiness of things like Madame Cleo and the Psychic Friends Network. People trust their guts and have intuitions all the time, and I have always liked the idea of synchronicity, though the release of the 1983 Police album of the same name was the first time I had ever actually heard the word. It makes me happy to think about unexplained coincidences and leave open the possibility that there are unseen benevolent forces orchestrating them.

That being said, I wasn’t prepared for what happened when Nora channeled for me. I can’t remember exactly what she was talking about, but I remember being overcome with emotion (read: starting to sob uncontrollably). So much so that I had to lie down on the reiki table in Jon’s studio (that’s how I first met Jon. Lucky Jon.). it was like that line in Killing Me Softly by Roberta Flack: I felt she found my letters and read each one out loud. Like some core, incredibly vulnerable part of me was being exposed. Not judged or injured, just treated to he light of day for the first time ever.

Poor Julie. She got a session for herself too, right after mine. When I came out of Nora’s office having completely lost it, not only did she feel bad that her birthday present to me was, um, overwhelming, but she had to be wondering what the hell she had gotten HERSELF into. And should she make a break for it? But her session was fun and gave her some new ways to think about her life patterns and choices, which is what I had been hoping for with mine.

But after the storm had passed, I felt lighter, like I had gotten rid of some baggage. I started consulting Nora regularly and have done so since then.

I’m not evangelical about Nora in particular or channeling in general. I love to talk about it, and tarot cards, which I’ve been reading for a couple years now (Nora uses them to channel). But she has been extremely helpful to me, which is why I continue to consult with her. I credit her for helping me learn to take complete responsibility for my life. My expectations and beliefs are responsible for the experiences I have, and if I don’t like what I’m experiencing, then I need to look at what I’m doing and believing to bring those experiences to me.

I never would have had the courage to take this “vision quest” if I hadn’t started to think about the world and my life differently, and Nora gave me some of the tools I needed to start doing that. And since I’m becoming increasingly convinced that taking this trip is the best decision I’ve made in a long time and possibly ever, I’m really grateful to her.

I had taken tarot reading and channeling classes with Nora and Jon before, and feel like I know them fairly well, but this was the first time we had socialized. I was a little—not apprehensive about it because I know we all care about each other, but it was different, so I was kind of wired before I saw them. I think they felt the difference too, because they said they consulted the cards before I arrived. When I asked what they said, Nora said they said I was a little high strung lately (sometimes channeled information = what you already know) and that she and Jon needed to make sure not to take any of it on themselves.

Well, we had a GREAT visit. They have built a beautiful life for themselves, supported by their reiki practice and channeling clients, in a geographic location that suits them much more than Chicago seemed to. (This is something I am looking for too! You’re your fingers crossed that I get a “hit” on someplace while I’m on my trip.) They drove me around some of the surrounding towns, including to the Willow Wood Restaurant

where we had an amazing dinner, and to Andy’s Market in Sebastopol


where I bought amazing fruits and veggies. (In the above pic, see if you can make out the stains on my shirt, from eating while driving. It’s sad, really. Also notice the perfect shadow on Jon's shirt of the nice lady who took our picture.)

Thanks again to Nora and Jon, who showed me great hospitality and love. I look forward to being able to return the favor when I find a place to land—assuming they will ever leave their little haven!

Weekend relaxation, Alaska style

It’s my last night in Juneau. I am making Debbie get up at the ass crack of dawn to take me to the airport for my 6am flight. Why must I fly so early in the morning? I never get any sleep the night before a flight this early, and it sucks having to get up. I’ll remember for next time.

The weekend was really fun. On Fri Debbie, CB and I did about a 9 mile round trip hike to Granite Creek, another destination off Perseverance Trail. Again, it poured down rain the entire time. And yet, again it was a great day. Debbie and I picked salmonberries compulsively, filling a couple Ziplock bags with them (I may have written about this already).

After drying off and having some tea, we walked downtown, where cruise ships like this one dock and unleash bunches of tourists on the nearby stores:

Most of the stores seem to be jewelers, though there are also tons of places to buy t-shirts, moose and bear “droppings” (who knew wild game pooped delicious chocolate treats?), and novelty items like Alaska playing cards and salad tongs. Oh, and kettle corn. If you haven’t had kettle corn, you are definitely missing out. It’s regular popcorn popped with sweet kernels, but not as sweet as caramel corn. Debbie and I ate lots of a bag of kettle corn, to prepare our digestive tracts for dinner, which we ate at a place called The Hangar with Debbie’s friends Chuck and Sante.

Debbie delivered Chuck and Sante’s 2-year-old son, who apparently is a big music fan, The Eagles in particular, and can sing anything from their entire oeuvre. Including, I made sure to confirm, my favorite part of Heartache Tonight: “We can beat around the bush or we can get down to the bone, we can leave it in the parking lot but either way there’s gonna be a heartache tonight, a heartache tonight, I know.” Sadly, I have not seen him in concert, but according to Chuck, Sante, and Debbie, he’s very talented.

Dinner was fun; it was Chuck and Sante’s weekly night out and Debbie and I were glad they decided to spend it with us. We had a great, far-ranging conversation, including one part where I had to defend Brazilian jiu jitsu because of a story Sante read in Slate about how BJJ is the “gayest martial art.” I call bullshit on that because usually when I’m doing BJJ, I’m doing it with a dude. So I think they mean it is the most SEXUAL martial art. (BTW, see the BJJ glossary on my main page http://www.valerieworthington.com/ for discussion of the disparagement of BJJ because it looks “sexual.” It ain’t.)

Anyway, in another part of the conversation, I mentioned to Chuck, who along with Sante was born and raised in Alaska (Chuck in Skagway, Sante in Juneau), that in my conversations with people who live in Alaska, one or two of them have implied or out and out stated that they came here because of run-ins with the law in other parts of the country. Chuck allowed as how that’s not actually uncommon, and suggested that if you go after hours to the Denny’s in Fairbanks (the northernmost Denny’s in the world, btw), you’re likely to see a restaurant full of people who are happier with a little distance between themselves and law enforcement. (For the record, the people who have mentioned to me that that’s their reason for being here are actually quite lovely and friendly.)

Here is a picture of us, Debbie, Sante, Chuck, and me:


Yesterday was another great day: in the morning, another client of Debbie’s was able to finagle us two spots on a whale watching boat—for free. The client is friends with the guy who captains the boat. He is also friends with Debbie, and they took great care of us. Those tickets are usually pretty expensive, so we lucked out. And according to Debbie, who’s been on a couple of these expeditions, we saw some good whale. Debbie actually saw a whale breach completely out of the water; I mostly saw blow holes and tails, but it was still way cool. Here are some pics of the tails:


Our guide was very informative, explaining that humpbacked whales are about the size of a school bus, that they eat about 2000 pounds of food a day, and that the males sing a song to woo the females during mating season. Every year or two the males alter the song a little bit, ostensibly because the females get bored easily and need some new tunes to get in the mood. The coolest thing was the description of how the whales work together to eat, using a technique called the bubble net. One whale swims around a bunch of food (krill, plankton, herring) exhaling a steady stream of bubbles. The bubbles create a tube that traps the food in a small space, and then the other whales swim up the tube eating the trapped food.

It’s nice that the whales work together. This was not my experience growing up, where especially if there were desserts in the house, you had to engage in what my family called “defensive eating:” even if you didn’t want some of the dessert at a given point, you ate it then and there, because there would be no later. So basically, I’m saying that the whales are better at adhering to the Golden Rule than my own family.

Yesterday was also the first day since I’ve been here where the sun actually came out! So of course it was also a day on which I decided to take a ginormous nap. I thought I might be coming down with something, and I’m hoping I slept it off. But it was only about 2 hours, and then Shane took us to the firing range so we could play with some more of his toys: GUNS.

We fired some pistols, specifically a .22, a .22 mag, and a .40, as well as Raging Bull, a giant pistol with a scope. Raging Bull had a pretty big kick, so I was glad that Shane instructed me to keep my arms straight while firing; otherwise I would have gotten clocked in the face.

Then we moved on to the rifles and the shotgun. Rifles and shotguns are far easier to shoot, which is why Shane had us start with the pistols. I also finally learned the difference between a rifle and a shotgun: a rifle shoots a bullet that contains a small amount of gunpowder while a shotgun shoots a cartridge that contains a bunch of BBs that spray everywhere. As Shane said, “It’s easy to do some damage with a shotgun.” I have decided that if I ever need to get shot for any reason, I’ll get shot with a rifle or a pistol rather than a shotgun.

So here are some pics of us at the firing range. It was a blast, no pun intended!

Practicing "gun safety:"

My newest fashion accessory:

Setting up the targets:

The .40, the .22, and the .22 mag

Lining up the sights:

What it looks like when you know what you're doing:

Mild freakout when the gun malfunctioned (I pulled the trigger but nothing happened):

Is it wrong to be having so much fun?

The couple that shoots together...

Shooting Raging Bull:

Scrutinizing Shane's technique to see if I can pick up some pointers:

Busting out the rifles:

Protecting my hearing, in style:

Me reacting to the damage the shotgun does:

Look at that!

Needless to say, we worked up an appetite shooting at things, so then we had a quintessentially Alaskan dinner: moose meat fajitas, smoked caribou steak, and ice cream with the salmonberries Debbie and I picked.

Oh, and Debbie and Shane think it’s hilarious that I am blogging all the time, so here is a picture Shane took of me writing about what I’m experiencing instead of actually experiencing something. It’s a hard balance to strike. I think I'm becoming some kind of David Sedaris wannabe, because apparently whenever he has a conversation with a member of his family, the family member asks, "Oh, God, you're not going to write about that, are you?" And then he lies and says no. I don't write about things if people don't want me to, but more than one person has expressed surprise that something they said ended up immortalized here.

The best part, of course, is that while I was blogging, Shane was sitting next to me cleaning guns. I just have never been around guns very much, so they intrigue and scare me, and when I was younger, I had the not very reasoned belief that guns = bad. Fortunately, in recent years I have had the opportunity to spend time around guns under the supervision of people I know who are extremely responsible and intelligent about them. Well, except for Debbie, who pointed that rifle at me. And except for me, who didn’t even have the good sense to be nervous that there was a rifle pointed at me. But I’m thinking of my uncle George in particular, who was the first person to take me shooting. He is incredibly safe with his guns and it’s clear that the majority of people who own them are responsible and thoughtful. I still like a middle man between me and my meat, but shooting inanimate stuff is COOL.

Sunday was another sunny day, so we did a couple hikes, one on Douglas Island, and one near the airport. CB took it upon himself to bathe in the mud several times, complete with the barking/singing that characterizes his other baths. Then he took it upon himself to shake off the excess mud right in front of me and Debbie. Thanks, CB! Debbie and I compulsively picked blueberries this time. Then when we went to take a few out of the bag, we saw a crapload of worms. I guess you have to soak the berries in salt water to get rid of the worms, but I don't want to think about how many worms I may have eaten just popping a berry or two in my mouth on the trail.

And now here I am blogging, enduring CB’s gas, getting ready to get up at 3:30am for my flight. It’s been a terrific week, and I’m excited and apprehensive to get back on the road. Juneau has been safe and comfortable, and now it’s back to the unknown. I’m excited to train again and to see my car again, but I will miss Debbie, Shane, and the dogs! Thanks to them for showing me such a wonderful time!